# General Category > General Chit Chat >  New Beginnings

## magie06

My other thread was a bit long. 
I treated myself to an iceburger ice cream yesterday on my way to pick Aisling up from school. I haven't had one in years. So I pulled away from the shop, opened up my ice cream and discovered there was only one chocolate biscuit. So it was an open sandwich. I kept my wrapper and sent off an old fashioned letter to let them know how upset I was. I'll let you know how I get on.

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## Suzi

Hey Magie, lovely new thread - but what's an iceburger ice cream?

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## Paula

Iceburger  ice cream? Whats that?

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## magie06

Omg, I'm sorry. An iceberger is two chocolate biscuits sandwiching vanilla ice cream. The size I think is what we used to call a 5p slice from the ice cream van man. It's bigger than a 3p slice but not as big as a 7p slice. It's generous.

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## Paula

Sounds delicious!

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## Suzi

Sounds yum! I'm so glad that you went to treat yourself! You really need to do things like that more often....

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## OldMike

I'm glad you explained what an iceburger ice cream was shame there was only one chocky bikky though, good on you Magie firing off an old fashioned letter to them hope you get a positive response.

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## magie06

Aisling and I went for a very old-fashioned spin yesterday. We asked Gerry to come along, but he preferred to stay home. This is turning into "our" thing on a Sunday, and it's lovely to have time together without screens. We went to dad's home house , well the ruins of it and Aisling was surprised with how small it was. The painful thing is that because there are no pubs or restaurants open there is no where to go to the loo. Still it means that I get to see some of my family because I'd never make it home.

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## Paula

What a lovely thing to do! It still makes me beam to hear of your amazing relationship with Aisling  :):

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## Suzi

I completely agree!

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## magie06

Honestly, I'm making it my business to do things like this with her. Every day our relationship shifts and changes, and I want to be able to change with it.

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## Suzi

It's so awesome. She's so lucky to have you!

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## OldMike

That's really nice some quality mother and daughter time.

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Flo (18-05-21)

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## magie06

I had a call from a friend this morning. We met up for coffee and had a look around our local shops. It's such a novelty to have the open again. I stopped to say to each of the staff that it is lovely to see them again.

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OldMike (18-05-21),Paula (18-05-21),Suzi (18-05-21)

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## Suzi

I'm so glad you're getting out and doing things which are positive for you atm

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## magie06

My hair appointment is on Friday. My hair really needs to be cut. I've got dreadful split ends and my colour has all grown out. 

I got very fed up with Aislings attitude yesterday. I took myself off to my room to try and calm down. I had tears in my eyes and I didn't didn't want to upset her. I've tried to call my case worker all morning but I can't get through. Our health services computer system was hacked into last week and I don't know if that has anything to do with the phone lines.

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## Suzi

What's up with Ais attitude? Why did it upset you? Do you need a hug from me? I can reach all the way from here to you look ******HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU  UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG  GGGGGGGGGG********

Which case worker? Are you OK? What aren't you telling us?
Are you eating and drinking enough? Taking meds as prescribed? Have you created a stash? How are your moods?

Oh hunni, I wish I could be with you x

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## magie06

She's stressed out because end of year exams start next week. She has been revising and she asked my help with maths yesterday. She tried to explain to me what she had to do, but I just didn't get it. She started to shout at me, and I just couldn't take it. So I went up to my room so she didn't see me cry. 

I tried to get Bridget today. I really just needed to talk to her because the urge to s/h was very strong. I also wanted to ask about the zispen because I've very tired all the time.

Oh and thanks for the huge hug Suzi.

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## Suzi

She was out of order to shout at you. Did you tell her that it upset you? 

Did you manage to speak to Bridget? Has the urge passed? Have you told G how you are feeling?

Also, just checking - are you building a stash of meds again?

You can always have hugs from me x

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## magie06

I haven't mentioned it yet to Ais. I'll wait until the weekend and mention it then. 
I didn't get through to Bridget. They just was no phones working at all. I might call out there tomorrow after physio, and see if I can talk to her. 
Gerry knows how I'm feeling. And he is in charge of all of my meds. I haven't any stockpiled any.

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## Suzi

I'm really proud of you for knowing to get hold of Bridget and that you aren't stashing any meds.

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## Paula

You definitely need to talk to Ais, but youre right to wait til the weekend when therell be less school stuff to deal with. She needs to know that this attitude has consequences and youre human too....

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## magie06

I get that we're coming up to the end of the year, but I get up every day with a smile on my face for her. It's hard to believe that she will be on holiday from Friday week 28th.

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## Suzi

Hunni, you are allowed to tell her she was out of order. Maybe you could help her find other ways to deal with stress etc?

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## Paula

When I was a teenager, one year I forgot Mothers Day. It took 2 weeks for my mum to admit to me how hurt she was. That incident had 2 consequences. One, I realised that I should never take it for granted that I could behave how I wanted and mum could take it on the chin just because shes a mum. Two, I really wished shed told me earlier - I was devastated that she felt she couldnt talk to me about it, but also I was devastated that shed been carrying this hurt, that Id caused, around for 2 weeks

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## Stella180

Hey, you think you could share that sorry with my kids Paula  :(:

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## Paula

:Panda:

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## Suzi

I completely agree Paula x

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## magie06

I called the school yesterday because there is a timetable on their website for Monday 31st May. I wasn't sure if Ais was trying to pull a fast one by telling me she was finishing on the Fri. They called me back this morning, and they are definitely finishing on Friday. I just mentioned to them that Ais is getting very stressed about the end of year exams next week.

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## Suzi

Well done for talking to the school... Did they seem supportive?

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## magie06

I love the school secretary. She always says I'm doing the right thing when I call to tell them about Aisling. Plus she tells me that Ais is a princess in the school. Every parent likes to hear things like that.

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Paula (22-05-21),Suzi (22-05-21)

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## Suzi

I bet she's being totally honest too  :O: 

Have you spoken to her and told her that she upset you this week?

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## magie06

We had another spin yesterday and I told her that I was upset about the way she shouted at me. She got upset because she hadn't realized. But we cleared the air and I really enjoyed our chat. 
In other news, it took us over an hour to drive one and a half miles on the way home. The traffic was dreadful. There was some sort of modified car gathering in the city and I'm not joking when I say there were hundreds of cars. I understand that they want to meet up, but maybe in the future they could use an unused airfield or close off some roads to facilitate them.

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## Suzi

I'm so proud of you for talking to her about it. It's important that she knows that you are human and have feelings too.... I'm so glad that you did it together, calmly, cleared the air and had a really good chat!
Oh! Sorry about the traffic, but it gave you longer to chat and just "be" with each other? But yes, I know how annoying things like that can be. I live about 10 mins away from Brooklands Museum and they often have special car days etc....

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## Paula

Well done! And Im glad she understood what you had to say to her  :):

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## Stella180

I was a part of the classic car scene for years and took part in organised events and none of them involved hanging out on McDonalds car parks and driving like morons or the streets. These cruise events should be illegal. My cousins used to attend them but I never got involved and don’t agree with them at all.

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## Flo

We only live a mile or so from a 2nd WW airfield which has been turned into a stock car racing stadium, and drivers who want to 'pose' in their BMW's and are allowed to race the guts out of them. On a fine windless day you can hear them from our house!

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## Suzi

There used to be a huge one in Guildford, but it was shut down after some accidents happened...

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## magie06

They have a Facebook page called Salthill Sunday's. They have photos up of lots of cars and just some of the traffic tailbacks they caused. 
All of the phone systems are still down in our health service. I called to Toghermore yesterday to ask Bridget to call me. She called me this morning. I told her everything. Really everything. She will call me again next week.

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## Paula

Has she made any suggestions?

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## magie06

Just to keep doing what I'm doing, walking, talking, taking my meds, getting enough sleep. All the stuff that you tell me to do.

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Paula (25-05-21),Suzi (25-05-21)

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## Suzi

I'm seriously proud of you for going to leave a message asking her to call you. That is so positive. 

Do you want to tell us what's going on for you?

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## magie06

Pain, tiredness, a grumpy teenager, a stubborn father. Nothing really.

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## Paula

That is something, a lot of somethings....,

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## Suzi

Sounds like a lot to me too...

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## Stella180

Doesn’t sound like nothing

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## magie06

My back and knees are very sore. I have tried to get a gp appointment, but they are backed up for ages.

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## Suzi

I'm sorry about that love, are you doing things to be gentle with them? No scrubbing the floors etc......

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## magie06

I'm so sore that I can hardly walk to the bathroom.

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## Paula

Are you taking all your painkillers? Do you think you should call the doctor?

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## Suzi

I agree, definitely get seen lovely. You shouldn't be in that much pain.

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## magie06

Both Gerry and Aisling are on holiday this week. I don't think I'll be around much.

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## Strugglingmum

Enjoy your week together

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## Suzi

Have fun! Hope you have a great week!

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## magie06

We had a lovely week together. We didn't do a lot but I think I relaxed more this week, than I have in ages. Yesterday, my sisters and I went to the Marion shrine of Knock. We had a very nice morning, where we did a bit of praying and attended mass. It was so nice to be able to spend time with them. The time went too fast. 
In the afternoon Aisling and I went for our now traditional spin. We were late leaving so we didn't get home again until almost 9. But we didn't have anything to get up for this morning, so we were able to have a lie-in.

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## Stella180

Welcome back!! Feels like you’ve been gone forever. Glad you had a great week. Had a mini pilgrimage this morning eh? How was it? Not as busy as usual I would imagine due to the pandemic.

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## Paula

Sounds like a lovely time with your sisters  :):

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## Suzi

Sounds like you've had a wonderful time! I'm so glad to see that you have! 
I love that you've started this outing with Ais - special time to make memories...

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## magie06

I am thinking of going to Achill island for our next spin. There is a beautiful beach called Reem beach to the north of the island. Trouble is, we were both bored today. Not that that's a bad thing, but I'm thinking of taking the trip tomorrow. Should I keep it as our Sunday thing and find something else to do tomorrow?

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## Stella180

Why not take two trips out this week? Tomorrow and Sunday?

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## Strugglingmum

Oh I love Achill Island. Go for it. Nothing beats a wee day out.

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## Suzi

Hunni, you could go for a trip out every day if you wanted to! The world is your lobster (  :):  ) and so you don't have to follow a set pattern...

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## OldMike

Take as many trips as you like Magie you don't have to have a set pattern if you don't want you're a free agent.

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## Suzi

Morning hunnipie, what did you decide in the end?

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## magie06

We were in Galway. 
The letter I wrote to the ice cream business has had a result. I received a five Euro voucher in the post this morning.

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## Suzi

YAY! Hooray! Free Ice Cream!

Did you have fun in Galway?

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## magie06

Yes. Aisling had jeans to return to Primark, so we went there and I managed to spend another 50 Euro. Her friends would like a beach day next week. They were waiting to see if one mum could bring them. The poor woman has 3 other kids who are still in national school therefore not on holiday yet. Plus she works outside the home too. I told Ais to tell them that I would bring them. Ais didn't want to ask me because we are going to tayto park theme park next week too. I explained that my job was to look after her, and bring her where she wanted to go, within reason. I can buy them all a free ice cream!

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## Suzi

Aww! That's so lovely that she thought of you like that! I think she'll love that you're doing that and getting them ice cream too!  :):  You two have such a great relationship! How are you feeling atm love?

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## magie06

I'm up and down. But I'm still here and still fighting.

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## Paula

What a sweetheart your little girl is - but then she obviously takes after her mum!

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## Suzi

I'm so proud of you love. Are you still in touch with Bridget? How are your joint pains?

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## magie06

Bridget calls once a week. I'm sore almost every morning getting up and I take painkillers every 4 hours to keep myself moving. 

I will be chief taxi driver next week. Achill is still on the menu for Sunday (although, maybe not this week), Ais and 3 friends would like a lift to the beach on Monday, and we are going to tayto park on Thursday. That's a lot of miles to cover, so I might leave Achill until later in the summer.

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## Suzi

Have you spoken to your Dr about the soreness and pain? 

It's really good that you're trying to listen and pace a bit with all that driving too love. That's hugely positive...

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## magie06

We went to the beach today. It was absolutely freezing. The girls were great. They are all so polite. It was a pleasure to spend time with them.

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## Sissy

I am happy you had great time. I am sorry for you having pain, wish there was some magic trick to help you. I have a dear friend who was recently diagnosed with chronical pain and continuous inflammation in her central nerve system. It had a fancy name that I forgot, but looking at her being in constant agony is heart breaking. Wish there was a way to swipe that pain away. Are you getting medication that actually helps to keep that pain away? Or are you trying to manage with something not that effective?

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## Suzi

Freezing? I wish I was there with you instead of sweltering here! So glad you had a lovely time! 
What's on the plan for tomorrow?

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## Paula

> We went to the beach today. It was absolutely freezing. The girls were great. They are all so polite. It was a pleasure to spend time with them.


Of course they were great. Your Ais wouldnt have friends that werent :):

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## OldMike

> We went to the beach today. It was absolutely freezing. The girls were great. They are all so polite. It was a pleasure to spend time with them.


That's so nice I think cold weather isn't a problem just rap up warm.

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## Suzi

What have you been up to today?

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## magie06

I'm very sore and tired today. It's not surprising because I drove over 400km yesterday and took 20,000 steps. (Almost). We were in Tayto park which is the only theme park in Ireland. We left home at 7.30 yesterday morning and got home around 7 last evening. Ais and her friend had a blast, and I enjoyed myself very much too. The only problem is that it is a very long day. 

I've made an appointment to see my GP about my pain levels. The first appointment I could get is for Thursday week 1st July. If I need one sooner I have to ring in the morning and see if there are any cancellations.

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## Stella180

20000 steps? That’s epic. Well done.

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## Paula

Im so glad youre going to talk to your GP. As I recently had to make clear to my mum, if you struggle to do the things you love because of pain, then theres a problem that needs to be sorted

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## Suzi

I'm relieved you are going to talk to her too. You shouldn't be in pain all the time love.

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## magie06

We have a wildlife park down the south of the country. Ais was saying she'd like to go. Unfortunately it's booked out for July and August, and the weather later this week is crap. So we're off on the road again tomorrow. We're going to spend the night down there because I was very tired after our trip last Thursday. They also have a Titanic experience down there, so we're booked in for that on Tuesday morning. We'll come home sometime on Tuesday.

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OldMike (21-06-21),Paula (20-06-21)

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## Suzi

I really want to see the Titanic exhibition too! How are you feeling about going and spending the night somewhere?

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## OldMike

Sounds like fun Magie best stay overnight rather than do it all in one day.

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## magie06

The hotel is lovely. Right on the sea front and we have a wonderful view from our room. Our room has been completely sanitized and cleaned before we checked in. I'm a lot more settled now that we're here. 
The wildlife park was wonderful. It was very warm and sunny, and most of the animals were lying down soaking up the sun. I had 10,000 steps done before we were half way around. 
We've settled into the room, which is more like a suite and we're going out for a walk along the prom now.

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## Stella180

You’re clocking up a few miles lately. Well done.

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## Suzi

Wow! That sounds amazing! I'm so proud of you for doing this!

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## Paula

Sounds like youre having a wonderful time!

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## magie06

We had a great time in Cork. I was very tired after the journey. I think because I'm not used to driving that side of the country and the roads were strange to me. We made it home in one piece and Aisling hasn't decided yet where we go this week. She came to me yesterday and asked if we were going for our spin so we went to Crough Patrick. People have pilgrimed there for hundreds of years. They call it climbing the reek. It is the pointiest mountain in Ireland. A lot of people do it barefoot. Very difficult on the poor feet. 

Was anyone here trying to call me this morning? It was an unrecognized number and I didn't reply. I've been having a lot of hoax calls recently and I look up the number if I don't know it.

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## Paula

How are you feeling? Physically and mentally?

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## Suzi

Wasn't me calling you I'm afraid... 

Sounds like you two are having a great time! It's lovely that Ais wanted you to go out together!

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## magie06

Physically I'm very sore. I have a GP appointment on Thursday and I'm going to ask about x-ray or scan to see if my disks are bulging again. 

Mentally Bridget asked me last week if I wanted to be discharged from the services. I explained that while I'm okay ATM, but that my mood can change overnight, and it takes ages to get a new appointment.

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## Suzi

So are you staying under the care of the services? Are you being totally honest with them? Can I ask if you've been buying a stash or SHing at all? 
I'm glad you're going to get some help with your back love. Being in pain sucks..

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## magie06

No stash and no harming. I think it should be the psychiatrist to discharge me, not Bridget. I have an appointment with a doctor on the 9th of July. I'll see what they say then.

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## Suzi

No stash or SH is amazing. I'm so proud of you! I think if you could stay on with them, even if it was once every other month or so, just so you can touch base if you want/need to might be an idea?

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## magie06

We went to Athlone today. We had a lovely day out and it's only an hour away. But I'm very sore. 
I had a GP appointment yesterday. I told her how sore I am, and asked for an MRI to see if I have disk trouble.

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## Suzi

Did she make any suggestions to help with pain and soreness? I'm really, really glad that you called and were open and honest with her.

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## Paula

Im assuming the GP said yes, then?

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## magie06

She is arranging the appointment for me.

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## Suzi

Good. I'm glad. Did she have any ideas to help your pain levels?

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## magie06

Not really. I'm waiting for a call back from the doctor today. Aisling and I went for our usual spin yesterday. When we got home I discovered that I had lost control over my bowel sometime during our drive. I'm going to see what my GP says.

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## Jaquaia

Chances are it's related to your back  :Panda:

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Stella180 (05-07-21)

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## Paula

Oh hunni  :Panda: . Jaq may have a point - perhaps these drives out with Ais need to be put on hold for a bit?

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## magie06

I'm on my way to A & E. My GP wasn't happy with my sensations.

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## Strugglingmum

> I'm on my way to A & E. My GP wasn't happy with my sensations.


Very relieved to hear that. It definitely sounds like something is nipping or pressing on a nerve somewhere .
Sending love and best wishes.

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## Suzi

Oh lovely I'm so sorry... I hope you're seen fast and you get some answers....

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## magie06

Waited on chairs for 5 hours. Waited in cubicles until 3 am. Got to sleep around 4.30 - 5 and they came in and woke us at 6.30. I've had an MRI but I've been waiting since 1 to see a doctor. They are keeping me fasting in case they need to operate.

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## Jaquaia

Hopefully you get answers soon  :Panda:

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## Strugglingmum

Hope you are not waiting too much longer

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## Paula

:Panda:  :Panda:

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## Suzi

I hope you've heard and all is well....

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## Flo

Hope all goes well magie...thinking of you.

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## Suzi

Hope you're OK lovely...

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## Strugglingmum

Sending love.x

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## Paula

How are things, love? Do you need surgery?

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## magie06

No surgery thank goodness. They let me home, just said that my MRI was clear. No painkillers or suggestions for how to help my back. 
My niece tested positive for covid today. She's okay, had a bit of flu on Monday and Tuesday but is feeling better already. She's 22, so has age on her side.

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## Paula

So theyve not been able to explain what happened with your bowels? Have you got any follow up appointments? Should you be seeing your consultant? 

Wheres your head at?  :(bear):

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## Suzi

I echo everything Paula as said!

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## magie06

I wasn't given any information at all. I had a phone call this afternoon from the hospital to tell me that I tested positive for MRSA. I had to call my GP for a prescription but they need 24 hours to get it to the chemist and my chemist doesn't open on a Saturday. It's taken them 4 days to get in contact with me, so another 3 days won't kill me.

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## Suzi

I tested positive a few years ago... It was just lots of washing of bedsheets and towels every day and showering in hibiscrub every day... I hope it leaves you really soon.

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## magie06

I almost forgot that I had an appointment in Toghermore today. I called yesterday to let them know that I had spent time in hospital, and did I need a telephone consultation. The receptionist said that it didn't matter. Our covid deaths are increasing day by day with the delta varient so I told her that I would prefer a telephone call. 
The doctor agreed with me that I need to talk to someone again in 3 months time, and to stay on my meds as they are.

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## Suzi

That's really well handled lovely, I think that you not going there and talking to someone again and staying on meds as they are were the right decisions. How do you feel about it?

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## Paula

Im relieved theyre not mucking about with your meds. Whats the new meds youre waiting for?

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## magie06

My brother thinks I should get onto our local radio station to complain about the delay in getting my prescription. But it doesn't bother me. 
I'm waiting for antibiotics.

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## Paula

How are you coping, love?

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## Suzi

Oh no! You shouldn't have to wait for those because all it's doing is allowing the infection to get bigger/worse!

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## magie06

I'm okay. I'm very nervous about leaving the house. After what happened last Sunday, I really don't want to be too far away from a loo.

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## Paula

Thats understandable  :Panda:

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## magie06

I called the chemist early this morning and they hadn't heard from my GP. I called my GP and the secretary told me that they hadn't done anything about it yet. I'll call my chemist again after lunch and see if the have heard.

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## Stella180

Grrrrr, how frustrating.

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## Suzi

I hope you've heard by now... This is disgusting!

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## magie06

It's antibiotic cream for my nose and hibiscrub for a while.

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## Suzi

Do you still not have any?

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## OldMike

MRSA can be nasty best to get it sorted ASAP.

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## magie06

Gerry collected it yesterday afternoon.

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## Suzi

How are you feeling love?

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## magie06

While I was in the hospital, I missed my night meds completely and my morning meds were delayed by about 3 hours. I'm catching up with my moods since. I've had a headache most of the time, but it hasn't turned into a migraine (yet). But I'm being very kind to myself, I'm not doing much, but I'm catching up on my knitting.

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## Suzi

Oh no love, that's awful. It doesn't sound like they've looked after you very well at all... Have you got your MRSA stuff yet?  I'm really glad you're resting and being kind to you.

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## magie06

Yes, I'm on day 3 of the regime now.

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## Suzi

How are you finding it?

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## Paula

Hope you have another day of rest and kindness. Can I ask? Is MRSA the reason they think you had that problem with your bowels?

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## magie06

No. They think a nerve was pinched. It will probably happen again. 
I hate putting things into my nose. Flixanase is difficult enough, but the bactobane is another level. 
Aisling wanted to go to the cinema with her b/f today. I dropped her in and went to visit dad. Dad suggested that I get Ais to get the train to Athenry and collect her from there. It meant I didn't have to face the rush hour traffic in Galway. Plus it's making her a little bit more independent because she had to use the ticket machine at the station. There has to be a first time for everything. I was so worried all afternoon.

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## Paula

Well done for letting her do that - I completely get how hard it is..

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## Suzi

I also get how hard that is, but well done! Did she enjoy the challenge?

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## magie06

She was full of chat when she came off the train. They saw the new marvel movie.

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## Suzi

Black Widow? It's a great movie  :O:  So glad she obviously had a good time!

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## magie06

Omg it's very hot.

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## Suzi

It really is!

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## Stella180

I’m melting. Went out to organise some extra camping gear and just walking a couple of hundred metres I was totally drained and it was difficult to breathe in this heat. I hate it.

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## Suzi

Did you have your inhalers with you?

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## Stella180

Suzi, I popped out in the car and walked from the car to the shops and back again. I was home with half an hour. I thought I never thought for a minute I might need my inhaler to walk a couple of hundred feet. I didnt even take my phone with me.

Magie youre asthmatic too right? Are you struggling with your chest in this weather too? I cant work out if its the heat or allergies or just being a lazy fat sod. Maybe a combination of all of those things.

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## Paula

Im struggling. I always take my inhaler with me.

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## OldMike

Same here too hot for words it is supposed to break soon, yipee I  need to cool down.

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## magie06

I always have an inhaler with me. I'm really struggling with the heat. There is a lot more dust and pollen around so I'm trying to get to the beach each day. There's less pollen and less dust by the coast.

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## Suzi

You didn't take your phone? Hunni, please this weather is messing with so much and so many illnesses, please, please, please don't go without phone and inhalers...

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## magie06

My sister collapsed in the heat on Wednesday. She was in the garden and woke up in the middle of the flower bed. My niece was in the garden and ran to help her. She didn't make it to the door before she passed out again. When she came round the second time, they were calling an ambulance. They were told that the ambulance would take about 2 hours because of a delay in A & E. My other sister and my niece got her into the house and gave her a cool shower and put her lying on the bed. They have a desktop fan and put that beside her, and kept changing the cool wet cloth on her forehead. She has come around since, but is not allowed into the garden until the weather breaks.

----------


## Suzi

Oh my goodness!!! I hope she's OK. I hope you're being as safe as you can be lovely x

----------


## Paula

Oh no, poor love  :(:

----------


## Strugglingmum

Poor sis. The heat is terrible at the moment. Probably better of inside.

----------


## magie06

She is feeling a lot better now.

----------

Paula (23-07-21)

----------


## Suzi

Ho are you lovely?

----------


## Paula

Morning, love  :):

----------


## magie06

Our weather has cooled down. But we had another Sunday spin on the sunshine yesterday. This time we went to visit Kylemore Abbey in Connemara. It is a beautiful place and it seems to be a very quiet spot. Aisling was amazed at how clean the outside of the building is, and I tried to explain that there is not very much pollution out there.

----------

Stella180 (26-07-21),Strugglingmum (26-07-21)

----------


## Suzi

So glad it's cooled down a bit for you love. Sounds like you're still having lots of fun. 

How're your thoughts love? Your pain levels?

----------


## Paula

Sounds fun  :):

----------


## magie06

Thoughts are like the weather ATM. Some times I feel like I can take on the world and I feel like the sun is shining out of me. Other times, it's like the black rain clouds are smothering me. But I'm doing my best to get up, showered and dressed every morning and anything after that I look on as a bonus.

----------


## Paula

Have you told Bridget any of this? Are you still on antibiotics?

----------


## magie06

I finished the antibiotics last week. Bridget is on annual leave for this week and next. I've asked for a face to face appointment next time. I just feel like I can say I'm fine over the phone, but if I say it face to face, it's harder to hide it, itms?

----------


## Suzi

Hunni, I agree with Paula, have you told Bridget how you are feeling? As Bridget isn't there can you talk to someone else?

----------


## magie06

I feel uncomfortable talking to someone new. I feel like I need to start my story from the beginning and I hate that.

----------


## Suzi

I can understand that, what about talking to Dr Anne? Haven't you spoken to others at Tog, not just Bridget?

----------


## Flo

> I feel uncomfortable talking to someone new. I feel like I need to start my story from the beginning and I hate that.


I know just what you mean. It's like when there is a new doctor that's taking the place of the one that you've known for years and who knows you. Starting from square one is a nuisance, but maybe a necessary one if you need it if you need their help.

----------

Suzi (30-07-21)

----------


## magie06

Just a quick check in with everyone. I've been talking to the receptionist in Toghermore and I'm waiting for someone to ring me back. I called on Monday and again this morning. I was just told that they are busy and a lot of staff are on holiday.

----------


## Suzi

You OK love?

----------


## Stella180

Wassup buddy?

----------


## Paula

Did Toghermore get back to you this afternoon?

----------


## magie06

No call back from Toghermore so I called again this morning. The receptionist just said that Bridget will be back on Monday so she'll call me then. 
I'm okay. This week I was wading through treacle. I found it hard to get up and hard to fall asleep. I've been twisting and turning through the night too. My sleep disturbance is a trigger to my mood dropping. That's why I wanted to talk to someone. I don't want to get into a situation where it takes too long to feel like me again.

----------


## Paula

Im proud of you for recognising youre struggling a bit. Have you any plans for the weekend?

----------


## magie06

I have an appointment at 6 this evening. My sister would like a lift to dad's in the morning around 7.30. Otherwise we have no plans, I'm going to Dublin on Tuesday next with Ais and her friend for her birthday.

----------


## Suzi

I am so proud of you for getting in fast before things become a problem. That's really brilliant love. 

So a quiet weekend? Are you crafting atm?

----------


## magie06

My baby turned 15 today. I don't look old enough to have a 15 year old daughter.

----------


## Stella180

Wow! 15 already. Only seems like 5 minutes ago she was just making double figures and now she’s a young lady.

----------


## Paula

Happy birthday Ais!

----------


## magie06

I'm very upset. My dad is being horrible and very nasty. He struck one of my brothers with a fence post during a big row this morning. He is accusing Sarah of stealing firewood from his shed and he has the whole family at odds with him. Sarah came to mine yesterday morning and spent the whole time crying. I was so worried about her. She told me that she was going for a walk in the park, along the river, on her own. I collected her and went with her, for my own peace of mind as much as anything. Turns out that it spilled down with rain, so we got an ice cream and sat in the car chatting.

----------


## Paula

Hunni, I know this is a horrible thing to consider, but would he be better in a care home?

----------

Flo (11-08-21)

----------


## Suzi

I agree with Paula. It sounds like his behaviour could be dangerous too. For the safety of everyone it might be the better option - also allows everyone to be son/daughter and not carer....

----------

Flo (11-08-21)

----------


## magie06

My brothers are finished with him now. My sisters are taking tomorrow off and meeting for coffee in the morning.

----------


## Stella180

Maybe he needs some time to realise just how much he relies on his family to get by and then maybe he’ll start appreciating what everyone does for him.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like a good plan tbh...

----------


## Flo

I must agree with Paula and Suzi, I think for the sanity of your siblings and yourself he'd be better off in a Care home. From what you've said in the past, financially it's possible. You all have lives to live and they should be happy lives, not ones that are spent worrying about how he's going to react every time he opens the front door.

----------


## Suzi

How are you today lovely? Did you ever get to talk to Bridget? How are your thoughts hunni?

----------


## magie06

I'm still very upset about the whole dad thing. My dad would never go into a nursing home. The cost doesn't come into it. He likes to be the lord of the manor and he will die in his own bed. He would be very difficult for all the staff if he was to go into a home. 
I've called Toghermore again today and I'm waiting again for Bridget to call me. I'm going to try my GP about 4 if she doesn't call by then.

----------

Flo (11-08-21)

----------


## Suzi

Are you struggling with your thoughts? I'm glad you called Tog to speak to someone. Have you heard back? 

What about getting carers to go into him?

----------


## Paula

Have they called?

I was also going to suggest carers - its not fair on the family for him to continue like this

----------


## magie06

I spoke with Bridget at last. She's told me to take some Xanax and to call again tomorrow to let her know how I slept. The doctors will be there on Friday if I need to change some meds.

----------


## magie06

My sister has organized for meals on wheels to call with dinner to him. But the bluebird care team have already threatened to refuse him calls if he abuses their nurses again. (Bluebird care are private nurses who call to people who are housebound to help with their care).

----------


## Suzi

So he's being horrible to them too huh? 

I'm glad you've spoken to Bridgette. Have you been talking about things with Gerry?

----------


## magie06

Yes. I've been keeping him up late into the night, asking what I should do, how can I help etc. Gerry has a very calm and considered view on life, and he can normally put a very clear and calm spin onto things. I always feel better when I talk to him

----------


## Suzi

I'm so glad that you are talking things through with him. That's so important, he needs to know or he can't help at all... 

How are you today love? Did you sleep?

----------


## magie06

I slept okay. I only woke about 5 or 6 times and I gave up at around 5 and got up.

----------


## Suzi

Is that better than you have been recently?
How are your thoughts?

----------


## Paula

> I slept okay. I only woke about 5 or 6 times and I gave up at around 5 and got up.


That doesnt sound like a healthy nights sleep to me.

----------


## Suzi

Morning love, did you sleep last night?

----------


## magie06

My sleep is gone to pot. They whole dad thing is terrible. He has said that Sarah staying away is all the proof that he needs that she was stealing and lying to him. Sarah is so upset that she has been in contact with the department to let them know she is not going back and to stop her payment. I think the public health nurse has been in contact with the GP about not coming out last week to give dad a sedative when he really needed it. My sister Geraldine is blaming Sarah for leaving dad to fend for himself and has been spending time with him all week. Ger thinks that dad is a vulnerable old man who needs his family around him. She thinks that he is suffering from depression since mum died and has even thrown it back at me, that I would have been very hurt if they had all turned their backs on me when I needed them. I've spent the last few nights crying myself to sleep only to wake every hour or so crying again. 
I have a face to face appointment with Bridget on Monday. I have already been talking to her about all of this, and she asked me to call her again on Thursday if things were no better. But I didn't do that. I don't think there's anything she can do.

----------


## Paula

Of course theres something she can do. She can talk you through things, remind you of your coping mechanisms and pick up if your mood is spiralling. Thats her job, love.

----------


## Suzi

There definitely is something she can do. 

Hunni I'm so sorry things are so crap. Why haven't you been posting - we are your friends and we are here for you. You'd hate it if one of us was struggling this much and haven't been talking... 
I'm sorry Sarah is struggling - but hunni, as hard as it is, you need to stop and focus on you. If Ger is feeling that way, then maybe she should be the one going in and dealing with him! 

Massive hugs gorgeous.

----------


## magie06

I had an appointment with Bridget this morning at 11. She basically said everything that you all said. I have to concentrate on Gerry and Aisling and myself. I am rereading my mindfulness program and trying to put it into practice again. My meds have been adjusted slightly to help me get to sleep and keep me asleep. Bridget is going to call me again on Wednesday to see if I've had any sleep.

----------

Flo (18-08-21)

----------


## Paula

Well done, love, for being honest with her  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

I'm so proud of you lovely! Talking to Bridget is brilliant and I'm so glad you spoke to her and were really honest. That's huge. You're doing everything you can to stay as well as you can.... Are you talking to Gerry about things?

----------


## magie06

Just checking in to say hello. I'm okay and getting from day to day as best I can. We're into the last week of our summer holidays here and we hope to make the most of it. I've asked Ais to decide where we go over the next few days.

----------


## Suzi

I was wondering how you were doing. It's good to hear from you. Are you still talking to Bridget?

----------


## Paula

Hows your pain? Mood? Eating? Sleeping?

----------


## magie06

Pain is just about bearable. Mood is up and down - a lot of time down, but I'm trying to fake it until it gets better. I've started counting my calories again and I'm trying to walk a little every day. I'm getting to sleep but finding it hard to stay asleep. I'm waking around 5 and at the same time finding it hard to get up. 
I have a face to face with Bridget on Monday at 11 and I have an appointment with an arthritis specialist on Thursday.

----------


## Suzi

Have you spoken to anyone about your pain love? I hope that the specialists with Bridget and the arthritis person really helps.

----------


## OldMike

:(bear):   :Panda:

----------


## magie06

Aisling and I went to Limerick today. Unfortunately I lost control again and I called the doctor on my way home. She wants me to go to the hospital again. I have an appointment in the morning at 9 and I'll just go to A and E after that.

----------


## Stella180

Did you realise this time what happened?

----------


## Paula

:Panda:  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

Oh hunni, I'm so sorry.... Did you have any warning? What were you doing just before - as in was there a trigger? Will you let us know how you get on?

----------


## magie06

I'll let you know how I get on. I didn't realize it this time either, there was no warning. I got a strange smell and found the nearest toilet and discovered my accident again. I ended up buying a towel so I wouldn't wet my car seat.

----------


## Suzi

Oh that's horrible. I'm sorry love. 
Hope you are seen really soon today hunni and that they find the answers.

----------


## magie06

I spent 11 hours in A and E and I have to be referred to the spinal unit. But I'll be able to sleep in my own bed tonight and be here for Aisling in the morning.

----------


## Paula

Oh love  :(: . When do you hear from the spinal unit?  :Panda:

----------


## magie06

I'm not sure. But I'm sure it will be a few weeks.

----------


## Suzi

11 hours? You must have been exhausted. I hope you're resting today love.

----------


## Flo

How awful Maggie, that's a terribly long time to wait in A&E! Let's hope you don't have to wait too long to hear from the spinal unit.

----------


## magie06

I took things very easy yesterday. I got Aisling out to school and went back to bed. I slept until 11.30. Today we had a family mass at 10 and I'm home again with my feet up. I'm going to take things easy for the rest of the weekend.

----------


## Paula

Good to hear, lovely

----------


## Suzi

I'm glad you are taking things easy lovely... Have you told Gerry about what's going on? What about Ais?

----------


## magie06

Aisling and Gerry both know. I've been with Aisling both times when it's happened, so she knows. And I've told Gerry all about it.

I have a face to face coming up with Bridget and I'm not looking forward to that. I suppose I'm tired of medical personnel and just wish I could take a break from this body of mine. If it's not one thing it's another.

----------


## Paula

I know how you feel, love  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

I sympathise too.... 

I think that right now, no matter whether you want it or not, seeing Bridget sounds like a really, really good idea. You've got so much going on, maybe talking things through with Bridget might actually be what you need love....

----------

Flo (05-09-21),Stella180 (04-09-21)

----------


## Stella180

I agree. It’s not just the emotional stuff but the physical stuff has an affect too

----------

Flo (05-09-21)

----------


## magie06

I'm waiting for Bridget to call me about seeing one of the doctors tomorrow. She thinks my meds need to be adjusted and she can't do that herself.

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, I'm sorry that you're feeling bad... Are you safe? Does G know? Are you stashing meds?

----------


## Paula

Youre dealing with a lot atm, and its a good thing theyre reviewing your meds

----------


## magie06

I'm talking to Gerry. 
I had a terrible conversation with Ais last night. She is finding being back in the physical school building very stressful. She's terrified that she will bring covid home. I've explained that I've had my two doses of vaccine and if she does happen to bring it home, chances are I won't get very sick. She's also worried that my back is getting worse very quickly. So I told her that I'm doing all I can, and that I'm just trying to take things day by day. 
She's just overwhelmed with everything and it came flooding out in snotty tears last night. I told her I was very proud that she told me and asked if she would like me to ring the school. She asked me not too, so I told her I appreciated her honesty and that I wouldn't go behind her back. Her period arrived at school today, and I have a teenager with a completely different attitude this evening.

----------


## Suzi

Oh poor love! I've had similar conversations with mine... Maybe she could use hand sanitiser when she gets in? That might be a small physical thing she could do as a barrier between school and home? Might help? Is she still wearing masks? 
PMT is horrible. It really makes everything little seem huge!
I'm really glad that she's talking to you - shows what an awesome relationship you both have. 

Well done for talking to Gerry and to Bridgett. I'm very proud of you. 
You didn't say about stashing any meds though?

----------


## Paula

Youve raised such a lovely, loving young woman

----------


## magie06

Not there yet Paula as you know. Suzi, I'm not stockpiling anything. I've heard from Bridget and she wants me to increase Seroquel to 300 at night for 2 weeks. And I have another appointment with her on the 20th of this month.

----------


## Suzi

I'm so proud of you love. You're working so well at keeping yourself well, being open with those around you and involved in your care.

----------


## magie06

I've been knitting a sweater for Aisling since she went back to school. She wanted one with a sheep on the front. She saw something similar on one of our summer day trips. I'm almost finished, a little bit of knitting to finish and the sheep to embroider onto the front. But my list is getting longer by the day. My niece's baby is due around the 16th October, and she would like a blanket. A friend would like a baby cardigan for her granddaughter who is approx 6 months, another friend would like dolls clothes for her granddaughter, and I would like to make at least 3 Christmas stockings. Otherwise, I'm taking things easy!

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like you're in high demand! I totally understand why, you're amazing! 

How are your moods love? Any news on the appointment from the hospital?

----------


## Paula

Hows things with your back, love?

----------


## magie06

No news from the hospital. Maybe today? 
I have an appointment with Bridget on Monday. 
I slept through the alarm this morning and I didn't wake until 7. My shower will wait until I come back from the school run.

----------


## Suzi

How are things with your mood and thoughts?

----------


## magie06

Mood is still low. I'm keeping my thoughts under control as much as I can.

----------


## Paula

Do you want to talk about things?

----------


## Suzi

Sorry you're still struggling with low mood love. Here if you ever want to talk....

----------


## magie06

I had a face to face with Bridget this morning. I got on okay with her. I have the doctor in two weeks and I'll see Bridget again 2 weeks after that. Of course I can call anytime my mood slips.

----------


## Paula

Have you heard anything about your back?

----------


## magie06

Nothing yet. I called my GP to ask if the referral letter has been sent off. It went on the 3rd of September marked urgent.

----------


## Suzi

Can she chase it up at all?

How are you doing really love?

----------


## magie06

This time of year is normally good for me. I'm busy, and I don't have time to think. That's always a good thing for me.

----------


## Stella180

Yeah, you’ve always liked being busy.

----------


## Suzi

I agree, you've always loved being busy...

----------


## magie06

I finished Aisling's jumper this morning. She loves it and even modeled it when she came in from school. I'm still not able to post pictures, so I'll ask Suzi to put it up for me.

----------

Paula (21-09-21)

----------


## Suzi

It's a beautiful jumper with an even more amazingly awesome model!

----------


## Stella180

Oh my god!!! She is so grown up now! Wow, she’s such a pretty young lass. That jumper looks super cosy.

----------


## Paula

Gorgeous!

----------


## Strugglingmum

Absolutely gorgeous Magie.

----------


## Flo

Beautiful jumper magie! :(nod):

----------


## magie06

It came out okay considering I had no pattern, she asked for oversized, she wanted a sheep on the front and I was literally going from a baby's cardigan that we saw during the summer.

----------


## Suzi

You didn't even have a pattern? Wow! That's even more amazing!

----------


## Jaquaia

That's amazing!!!

----------


## magie06

She has worn the jumper every evening when she's come home from school since I finished it. I think she might like it!! Lol. 
I've knit a baby cardigan for my friends granddaughter. I stared it last Wednesday, and I had it finished on Sunday. I've started a baby blanket since then. 
We've had the plumber and tiler in since the beginning of the week. The plumber came on Monday and stripped out the bathroom. The tiler came yesterday and started on the walls and floor. He's been here since 8 again this morning and is working very hard. He hopes to finish either today or maybe come back tomorrow to finish off. 
My anxiety levels are starting to come back to normal. My asthma has been triggered by all the dust though. I'm on my way to a full blown chest infection, but I'm hoping to avoid an antibiotic.

----------


## Stella180

I know how tough it is to have workmen in the house but it’ll be great when they’re done.

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, is there anyway you can try to keep one room as dust free as possible? Although, sounds like it's nearly finished! That's always the good bit!

----------


## magie06

The tiler ran out of tiles. He may be back either tomorrow or Monday. The plumber can't come back until Tuesday.

----------


## Stella180

Oh what a nightmare!

----------


## Suzi

Oh no! Is it looking good so far? Does it leave you without a bathroom over the weekend?

----------


## magie06

We have a shower room downstairs so we're very lucky. I've had to get steroids and antibiotics for my chest infection. But thank goodness I don't have to have a covid test.

----------


## Suzi

Hooray for not another test! 
Glad you've gone to get the meds to help, rather than suffer and it get worse.... 
Are you resting and pacing at all today?

----------


## Paula

Sorry youre poorly, lovely  :Panda:

----------


## Allalone

Hope you’re feeling better soon.

----------


## magie06

I waited for the tiler on Saturday and he was here at around 8am. He did what he could but both he and I were very frustrated that there were tiles broken in the boxes. He had to go away without finishing the job. 
I am knitting a blanket that I must have knit around 4 or 5 times before, and it's just going wrong on every row. But I took a deep breath and I've come up with a solution that's working so far. I've put a stitch marker every 50 sts, and I check that those stitches are correct before moving on. It's meant that I'm not ripping back 3 rows to find the mistake. Thankfully the baby it's for arrived safely yesterday, 3 weeks early, so my needles are smoking today getting it done.

----------

Strugglingmum (04-10-21)

----------


## Paula

Are you free of the chest infection? Hows your back, lovely? And wheres your mood at right now?

----------


## Suzi

I hate it when you get sections like that. It really hurts to pull out all your hard work! 
I was going to ask the same as Paula, but she's beaten me to it!

----------


## magie06

I still have 5 days of steroids and antibiotics to finish. My back is still not great. I'm having accidents almost every night. Although I'm busy and normally love this time of year, I'm a bit flat this year. I'm keeping track, and I will mention it to the doctor on Wednesday.

----------


## Suzi

Oh lovely, I'm sorry you're feeling flat. I am glad you're talking to your GP love. What about Bridget? Are you still talking to her?

----------


## magie06

My appointment on Wednesday is in Toghermore. I presume I'll see Bridget after.

----------


## Suzi

I'm glad that you still have that support lovely.

----------


## magie06

My appointment went okay today. No meds increase. I have been booked into seeing Bridget next week.

----------

Paula (06-10-21)

----------


## Suzi

Were you able to be honest about how you are really feeling? How do you feel about no meds increase? 
I'm glad you've still got Bridget. 

How are you today? How are you sleeping? How's things with your Dad? 
Has Ais taken off her sheep jumper yet?

----------


## magie06

I was very honest with the doctor yesterday. I told her that I have been on antibiotics and steroids for the chest infection, and that I think they were having an effect on my mood. I asked her not to increase the meds and she actually made me smile. She told me I'm on a heafty dose already. She is new to the service and newish to Ireland, and to hear her use such a slang term made me smile. She told me to check up on my orthopedic appointment because the incontinence is affecting my sleep. 
So this morning I've been chasing up to see where I'm on the waiting list. The person I spoke with couldn't give me an answer and told me to call a different number. When I called there, they only answer the phone between 10am and 12. In our public hospital system that is on its knees and they only operate the telephones for 2 hours a day! I'm a bit cross.
The plumber was due this morning and at 1.30 he still hasn't arrived. I'm a bit cross.

----------


## Suzi

I'm sorry you haven't been able to get through to anyone! That is really frustrating! 
Has the plumber arrived? 

I'm so glad you were open and honest with your Dr lovely. Is your incontinence every night? Becoming more frequent?

----------


## Paula

What a horribly frustrating day  :(:

----------


## magie06

The plumber arrived at around 11 on Friday morning and stayed to finish it all off. It's lovely and I am so glad we had it done. Our downstairs bathroom isn't big enough to turn into a wet room, but we can have a low rise shower tray put in. It just means I have a lesser chance of tripping up.

----------


## Suzi

YAY! I'm glad it's done! Glad you're having the downstairs turned into something more manageable for you love. 
Any news about your back appointment?

----------


## Paula

Fab!! How are you feeling?

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. Just waiting for a call from Bridget. S/H thoughts are very much to the fore today. I haven't done anything about them, I just keep telling myself that they are only thoughts. 
Yesterday I came over very, very tired so I went to bed around 2 and Gerry woke me again at 4. My sleep is very disturbed ATM, and I just think it caught up with me.

----------

Flo (12-10-21)

----------


## Paula

Im glad youre speaking to Bridget. Im worried about you, love, youve been low for a while now..

----------


## magie06

I have a face to face with Bridget next Monday. I told her what is going on, and she suggested that I go out next week. She has a couple of days off later this week.

----------

Suzi (12-10-21)

----------


## Suzi

Hunni can I ask some difficult questions? 

1) Are you stashing/buying meds? 
2) Are you acting on thoughts with SH? 
3) You've really stopped posting here as much as you have done, you normally do that when things aren't that great... Is that what's happening now? 
4) Does G know everything that's going on for you? 


I'm so glad you're talking to Bridget. Keep those lines of communication open love...

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. I'm not stashing ATM, not acting on the thoughts, trying to keep busy during the day and staying off the internet because I seem to steer towards su and sh sites.

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, I'm sorry you're looking at those sites again... Can I ask why you are? Does G know everything?

----------


## magie06

I find every day very long and I don't have much going on. I find it very easy to pick up my tablet or phone and go scrolling.

----------


## Paula

Is there something youve always wanted to do that you can start? I know how long those days are when no one else is at home, which is why I started my theological studies, and learning Spanish. Its something I can do at home but keeps my brain functioning itms

----------

Flo (14-10-21)

----------


## Suzi

I can understand that, but why head to those sites? If you don't actively search for them then you could use the internet for positive things? As Paula says, what about things like learning something different? Or craft along groups or similar? Or listening to podcasts?

----------


## Stella180

I can strongly recommend Mayim Bialik’s Breakdown podcast. Some interesting discussions about all areas of mental health with guest stars.

----------


## Flo

I have to agree with Paula. There must be something you'd like to learn now that Ais is older...doing something for you. learn a language, a creative course, or track your ancestry through Ancestry. It'll point your brain in a different and therapeutic direction. Try to steer your brain away from 'DEstructive' to 'CONstructive'. I've had to do that in the past...my mind was idle and homing in on negative 'everythings'! Let something GIVE something to you rather than TAKE AWAY from you. It's horrible for one's mind to be stuck in a rut...you're enduring life at the moment instead of enjoying it. A lot of us have been there and it's not nice.

----------

Jaquaia (21-10-21)

----------


## Suzi

Hey Magie love, how are you doing? 

I think Flo and the others are right. When was the last time you did something totally FOR YOU? It feels really wrong and selfish when  you do, but you have to in order to help get you brighter....

----------


## Flo

Have you ever thought of either starting or belonging to a knitting circle. You're an amazing knitter and very creative and I honestly think that 'bog standard' knitters like me could learn such a lot from you. It's truly a gift. Now that the darker afternoons are setting in I'm sure there'll be others that would jump at the chance of a knit and natter. We used to have one in Scotland and took it in turns to host our little creative get togethers...cross stitchers/knitters/ quilting...lots of cake and coffee!!! I appreciate that it's difficult with covid etc. but I'm sure friends would only be too pleased to wear a mask just so they could get together. It was a very positive distraction for me when I was really low. :(nod):

----------

Paula (21-10-21),Strugglingmum (21-10-21),Suzi (21-10-21)

----------


## Jaquaia

That sounds like a great idea and something I think you'd excel at Maggie!

----------

Flo (21-10-21)

----------


## Suzi

That is an awesome idea! You could also look into teaching a class in adult education or similar?

----------

Flo (21-10-21)

----------


## magie06

I've been thinking about doing classes from home. But every time I just chicken out. 
I've been talking to the school and they are very disappointed that I'm not going back. I just wouldn't be able for it. But they have taken on board my idea of getting the children to draw pictures, and I will pick the best (easiest) one to make into the door for Christmas. They are going to do it just after the midterm break. I've explained that it will take me a good while to get them ready. 
I'm almost finished the blanket for baby Lucy. I've been just concentrating on getting it finished.

----------


## Paula

What sort of classes were you thinking about?

----------


## Suzi

Can I ask why you won't be going back to school? I thought it was something you really enjoyed? 
Regarding classes at home, there are so many options!

----------


## magie06

My back has been very sore for about the last month. I think I can only walk about 100 mtrs, before I have to stop because of pain. My appointment is next Tuesday. I'm not sure what I'm expecting tbh, but hopefully I'll get some relief. 
The pain was so bad today that I really considered cutting again. My neighbour called in for coffee around 11 and she stayed until about 1. Then Sarah called until about 2, and Gerry was home around 2.30. I had prayed to my mom this morning to help me and I think she sent those people to me.

----------

Flo (04-11-21)

----------


## Stella180

Hey chicK, good to hear from you. I miss you when you’re not around the forum so much. I m convinced that when I was struggling when I lost my parents that they were there for me when I really needed their help. I got out of a number of difficult situations by what some would consider coincidence, but I know they were looking down on me. As time went by these occasions became less frequent as I learned to live without them. Clearly your mum recognised you needed some help and sent you what you needed. I’m so happy you got that support however it arrived. There will be a point where you have to help yourself more and more. This is how we heal. You will get there. Your faith is far stronger than mine so if can get there you definitely will. You are so much stronger than you think.

----------

Flo (04-11-21)

----------


## Paula

Is G going with you on Tuesday?

----------


## Suzi

Sweetheart I'm sorry things are that bad for you right now. I do hope you get a good plan for your care asap. I agree, it'd be good to take G with you and ask for his help to get across how bad things are for you.

----------


## Paula

Morning, love, how are you doing?

----------


## Suzi

I was wondering how you were too lovely.

----------


## magie06

Gerry will be working but my sister is going to come with me. I have put her on my insurance so that she can drive some of the way for me. 
I called Bridget today because I'm just fed up all the time. Unfortunately Bridget is off until Monday so Michelle rang me back. I explained what was wrong so she said that she would let Bridget know. I will ring her myself on Monday.

----------


## Suzi

I'm glad you're reaching out for support lovely, that's so important. When you say "fed up" how bad are things? 
I'm glad you've got someone going with you hunni.

----------


## Paula

:Panda:

----------


## magie06

Just fed up with everything. I'd love to be able to clean my house without having to stop every few minutes. It took me 2 hours to dust my bedroom on Monday and it's taken me over 2 hours to clean my bathroom today. Now I'm sitting here looking at my Halloween decorations that should have been put into the attic on Monday. I've been up and down the stairs a few times to clean my bathroom and neither my back or my knees will allow me to do any more. 
I need to find a new cleaner who will actually clean my house properly and not just move the dirt around. I don't want to hurt my other cleaner by telling her I'm not happy with her work.

----------


## Paula

How about a little white lie?

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, Im sorry you're struggling so much. Is it pain causing the low mood?

----------


## Stella180

I understand the difficulty of telling the cleaner you’re not happy. Something I find really hard too.

----------


## magie06

I was very tired after my appointment on Tuesday. But the good news is I don't need surgery. He said that there is a bulging disc and it has set the muscle above it into spasm. He has referred me to someone in Galway for nerve block injections. But no surgery thank goodness.

----------


## Suzi

Oh that's great news! I was hoping you'd pop in to let us know how it went! 
Has that helped with your mood at all?

----------


## Strugglingmum

I'm so pleased you don't need surgery. Hope you get an appointment soon for your nerve block.

----------

Flo (13-11-21)

----------


## Paula

Thats brilliant news! My mum has two bulging discs and theyve said theyd much rather not do surgery as theres a number of other treatment options. So far, shes had a lot of success with treatment. I hope you get a similar outcome

----------


## Lillyx

Hey! Saw this and wanted to say hello hope your all doing okay

----------


## magie06

I've heard from the pain clinic and I have an appointment this Thursday @ 8.30. I'm so glad that it is this week because I'm very sore. I'm fed up waking up every day in pain, going through each day swallowing pain killers and going to bed each night sore all over. If I get to sleep in a comfortable position, and move in the night, I wake myself up in pain. Then I spend almost an hour getting back to sleep. 
I'm trying to get the covers for the doors done for school, but it's taking a long time, and it's getting tedious.

----------


## Paula

Im so glad youve got the appointment! 

Hunni, please, please take it easy with the covers.

----------


## Suzi

So glad it's come through so fast for you love. 

Is it the theming of the doors that's tedious, or just that they are taking a long time to create?

----------


## magie06

I had my appointment this morning and I liked the Dr very much. He seemed very thorough. I have to get a dexa scan to check my bone density, I have to get an MRI of pelvis and hips, I've to have a colonoscopy and he's going to bring me back in to give me injections under local. I came out happy with my appointment.
Then I came home and started working on the doors. I was kneeling down to glue on a snowman's arms and my knee went from under me and I landed face down on the floor. I'm okay, just a bit sore.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds really thorough! I'm so pleased! 

Sorry about your knees, hunni can you not do them sat at a table, rather than kneeling on the floor?

----------


## Flo

Ouch! definitely try to sit at a table magie, much kinder to your knees. Pleased you had a successful dr's appt. and you came away optimistic.

----------


## magie06

Another chest infection and another covid test. I should have my results in 48 hours.

----------


## Paula

Hows your MH lovely?

----------


## Suzi

> Another chest infection and another covid test. I should have my results in 48 hours.


Oh no love. You seem to be getting them so often. Are you taking your inhalers etc? What about a meds review for your asthma?

----------


## Stella180

Oh you really are having a crappy year with your chest. Touch wood, I’ve been ok for a few years now but sometimes it can be literally one chest infection after another sand it’s such a nightmare. Hope you feel better soon.

----------


## magie06

No results from my covid test yet. I'm waiting to see a doctor. My appointment is at 5.

----------


## Suzi

Did you speak to the Dr? Have you explained about how many you've had recently?

----------


## magie06

I have an antibiotic for 7 days. Nothing else to report really.

----------


## Stella180

How are the doors coming along? Have you done your Christmas shopping yet? Are you still having your girly days together with Ais? 

I can think of lots of things I’d like to hear from you and these short replies worry me. You only do this when you’re struggling.

----------


## Suzi

Are you talking to Bridget? You sound really low hunni. Should I be concerned? I've noticed you aren't posting in here much.... Is that because you don't want our support?

----------


## magie06

Suzi, I would never think that. I just do the same thing day after day. I don't like just saying that I'm very sore, that I have another chest infection and that I'm not doing very well mentally day in and day out. It's just repeating the same thing each day.

----------


## Suzi

OK, that's understandable. Are you managing to get out for your Sunday drives with Ais?

----------


## magie06

We go shopping on a Saturday instead.

----------


## Suzi

For fun stuff or just groceries? 
Is she looking forward to Christmas?

----------


## magie06

We go Christmas shopping. I try to get my stuff during the week, so we can concentrate on her stuff on a Saturday.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like loads of fun! 

When do you speak to someone next about your back and your mh?

----------


## magie06

The 7th with Bridget and the 13th with the doctor in Toghermore. My back I'm not sure about. I have a colonoscopy on the 4th January and I'm still waiting to hear about my scans.

----------


## Jaquaia

Hopefully you hear back soon  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

Can you call for an update or to speed up appointments? 

How are your pain levels? Your mood sounds really flat.... Would that be a fair description?

----------


## magie06

Pain is just a part of me now. I've had the hospital onto to me (where I'm have my colonoscopy) and they wanted to know if I've tested positive for MRSA. And they asked also if I have a latex allergy. She then said that she wasn't sure which one trumped the other and would need to call me again. MRSA patients need to be last on the list and latex patients need to be first. But my appointment is for 7 am so I guess latex trump's everything else. 
Gerry got a voucher for a restaurant from a customer. It was for 50 Euro, and we were going to use it ourselves, but he asked if I would like to ask my sisters to lunch. We had our lunch together on Friday, and we discovered that it's the first time we've been all together since mum passed away. It was lovely. Totally and utterly lovely. We stayed talking until it got dark and then said goodbye. 
My sister Sarah, who has 3 children (2 adults and a teenager), has had a lot to deal with recently. Her middle son who is now 20 years old, has been stealing from her. In the past, he ran up a bill on a porn site of 700 Euro. He promised to pay it all back, but hasn't paid a penny of it. Recently (in the last 2 or 3 months) he has been transferring money from her current account onto a revolute (prepaid debit card). In total he has taken over 4,000 Euro. No I didn't make a mistake, it is really over 4,000 Euro. When I found out, I thought it was "only" just over 1,000 and I tried to help out by buying coal and getting it delivered to her house. I was with her another day and she was filling her car, so I skipped in and paid for it too. Now I'm making up a hamper for her with a few treats for Christmas for her. She has a wonderful heart and reminds me of my mum so much. She would never in her life take anything from anyone without paying them back. She is so upset.

----------


## Stella180

Holy cow, that lad sounds pretty wayward. Does he have his own job? Your sister is going to have to change her banking passwords. How can he do that to his own mother?

----------


## Suzi

Sorry to hear about the pain lovely, but I'm glad you've heard from the hospital. When are you going in? 
What a wonderful thing for Gerry to do with that voucher. That sounds like such a special time to have spent with them. I'm so glad you had that time. 
Sounds like he needs to be taught to respect his Mum! That's outrageous behaviour...

----------


## magie06

I brought my sister into Galway this morning. She had arranged to meet our brother for a coffee. Her husband needed the car, and she was going to take the bus. We had a lovely morning. We did a little shopping before we had coffee. 
I try to get Aisling something as a surprise each year for Christmas. Last year I bought her a piece of jewelry, but when I asked her if she'd like some more jewelry this year she told me no. But every time we go to a music shop, she heads straight for the vinyls. So today I bought her a record player and a copy of Queen's greatest hits. I just have to keep it hidden until I get it wrapped up.

----------


## Stella180

What a fab gift! I’m kinda jealous.

----------


## Suzi

That's an awesome gift!

----------


## magie06

I got my booster shot of moderna on Saturday. I hadn't any side effects from my first two doses, but this time, I'm feeling dreadful. I've a stinking headache and a temp of about 38. I also feel like my glands in my neck and under arm are swollen. 

Gerry and I put a hamper together for my sister. We put all goodies like biscuits and chocolates, whiskey, Bailey's and some bottles of coke and orange. We also put in some tea and coffee and other bits and pieces. She was delighted with it when she come over this morning.

----------


## Suzi

I feel for you. I had a pretty crappy reaction to my booster too - I had astra-zeneca the first 2, and then pfizer this booster. 
I hope you're resting and pacing as you are... 

What a lovely present for your sister! That's so kind!

----------


## Stella180

I had the Moderna shot on Thursday and my arm still bloody hurts. Luckily that, and feeling tired all t he time are the only side effects.

----------


## magie06

Yesterday I had an appointment with the doctor in Toghermore. He's not touching my meds at my request and would like to see me again in 2 months. 
This morning I finished the doors at school. But when I got home, I felt dreadful and I slept for almost 2 hours. I am feeling so bad that I called to make a GP appointment and I have that on Thursday morning at 11.15.

----------


## Suzi

I'm glad you were able to say you didn't want him to touch your meds. 
Well done for sleeping when you needed to lovely.

----------


## magie06

Drs appointment this morning went okay. My blue badge is due for renewal in January and I got a form in the post to get filled out. I also needed a clean prep script to be written up. My arm and other side effects are almost gone. I still have a bit of a headache but it's not as bad as earlier.

----------


## Suzi

So glad that you're seeing the Dr and that you're feeling a bit better...

----------


## magie06

I'm up to my tonsils. I'm behind in my cards, my wrapping and my making. I have my head down and doing what I can.

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, I don't think anyone who matters will mind hunni. Just be kind to you.

----------


## magie06

I got the important cards done. I got a lot of making done. I changed my bed, and I got Aisling's surprise gift wrapped. Now I'm going to chill out for the rest of the evening.

----------


## Suzi

Well done love!

----------


## magie06

I am almost up to date. I did a lot of sewing this morning. I called to see a friend who's not doing very well. I got my car washed, and filled with petrol. I collected a wreath to put on mum's grave and one for Gerry's mum's grave too. 
Tomorrow I am going into town. I am calling to 2 of my sisters and 2 of my brothers. Aisling will finish up around 1 and I hope to have a visit to dad's before I collect her. Otherwise, I'm fine!! Honestly, I'm fine.

----------


## Jaquaia

You do seem a lot brighter!

----------


## Suzi

It's so lovely to have you back posting. I miss you when you aren't around. 
Are you managing to stay away from those horrible sites etc? How is your pain? Your thoughts?

----------


## magie06

And Breathe!! I was going well until I had a message from Aisling's school to say that they were finishing up at 12.30 instead of 1. It meant that I got to see one sister and my two brothers. All schools finished between 12 and 12.30 today so traffic was mental everywhere. I dropped off all the gifts that I needed to and I dropped the stocking off to my sister for her grandchild. I was up until 11.30 finishing it last night. I slept through the alarm this morning and I didn't wake until 7.15. I'm normally up at 6.30.

----------


## Suzi

So, time for feet up and a rest then?

----------


## magie06

Feet up, Christmas music in my ears and asleep in front of the tv at 7.30. Today has been a lot easier. No alarm for starters. I got up around 9.30, wrapped what was left of the presents and just sat back.

----------

Paula (23-12-21)

----------


## Suzi

YAY! So pleased you got some feet up time!

----------


## magie06

Aisling came home from school with two awards on Wednesday. One was for not missing any time off school and the other was for encouraging others to use their Irish, and for being consistent with her school work and home work. She got a ten Euro voucher for each award. Very proud mum and very smug teenager in this house.

----------

Jaquaia (24-12-21)

----------


## Suzi

Wow! Well done Ais! How fabulous! How are you doing love?

----------


## Paula

Fantastic!

----------


## Jaquaia

That's awesome!

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. A bit lonely but that's what Christmas Eve is for. To remember those who are no longer with us.

----------


## Paula

:Panda:

----------


## Suzi

Massive hugs gorgeous. Are you talking to G about how you are feeling? 

 :Panda:   :Panda:   :Panda:

----------


## Stella180

I can totally relate mate. When you wake up it will all be about the people you have with you now. Celebrate what you still have instead of what is missing.

----------


## magie06

I'm so sorry that I didn't have my phone ready when Aisling opened her surprise gift. She loves it. Pity I only bought Queen, we've had it on loop since Saturday. But I'm so glad I got it for her.

----------

Paula (28-12-21)

----------


## Suzi

That's so awesome!

----------


## Stella180

Good excuse for you both to go record shopping together and build up her vinyl collection.

----------


## Suzi

OO definitely! Charity shops could be your best friend on this one!

----------


## magie06

Good tip. Thank you. G and A went shopping yesterday but they bought new.

----------


## Suzi

I was in the BHF charity shop a couple of days ago and they had loads in! Hope she and G had fun and bought some good tunes!

----------


## magie06

She bought Abba greatest hits. Ais loves the mamma Mia movies and knows all the words already.

----------


## Stella180

Maggie wanted to say a huge thank you for your Christmas card. It finally arrived on my doormat today while I was out. It’s awesome.

----------

magie06 (01-01-22)

----------


## Paula

> She bought Abba greatest hits. Ais loves the mamma Mia movies and knows all the words already.


Thats my kind of girl  :):

----------

magie06 (01-01-22)

----------


## Suzi

That's fab! Good choice Ais!

----------


## magie06

Colonoscopy went okay yesterday. There was nothing sinister but she did remove a rather large polyp. She didn't think that there was anything there that could have caused my problems at the end of the summer. Back to the drawing board.

----------


## Jaquaia

I'm glad it was nothing sinister  :Panda: 

Your Christmas card arrived this morning! Thank you! It's beautiful!

----------

magie06 (06-01-22)

----------


## Paula

Im glad thats done now, and with no nasty news. What happens next?

----------


## Suzi

It's good news that there wasn't anything sinister, and that they were able to remove the polyp.. 

Hope you get the answers soon love.

----------


## Stella180

> I'm glad it was nothing sinister 
> 
> Your Christmas card arrived this morning! Thank you! It's beautiful!


Bloody postal service. Mine was late too but totally worth the wait. It’s always lovely to receive something from Maggie cos it’s always something special.

----------


## magie06

I need to get in contact with the pain specialist and find out about my hip and pelvis scans. 
Today I took down our Christmas tree and boxed everything up, so Gerry can put them back into the attic. 
My blue badge is due for renewal and I had left a form for my GP to fill in before Christmas. I collected it today, and I'll put all the forms into the post on Monday.

----------


## Suzi

We took down our tree and decs yesterday. It all feels bare without it all... 
Definitely give them a call about your hip and pelvis scans love. 
Well done for getting the forms sorted. 

Thank you for my card which arrived today! It's beautiful!

----------


## Paula

My card arrived today, its stunning! Thank you xx

----------


## Jaquaia

We've put ours away and are putting it up this year as we feel it deserves to be admired!

----------

magie06 (08-01-22),Paula (06-01-22),Stella180 (06-01-22)

----------


## Suzi

We're doing the same!

----------

magie06 (08-01-22)

----------


## magie06

Omg guys my eyes are leaking. 
Gerry has been working overtime ATM because there are a lot of antigen tests in the system. But it meant that A and I had a lovely day in town, without someone in our ear asking where are we going, what do we need that for, that's too expensive, did you not get enough for Christmas? It was lovely and any of the shops that A wanted to go into, and that were too busy for me, I just waited outside. I have to use my rollator all the time now, so I always have my own seat with me. It was lovely. We got home around 3.30.

----------


## Suzi

Oh that sounds like such a lovely day! I'm so pleased for you!

----------


## magie06

I really enjoyed it. I bumped into a few old friends and had a chance to catch up while A was shopping. I even have a lunch date for next week.

----------


## Paula

Sounds bliss  :):

----------


## Suzi

A lunch date too! So pleased. It appears your mood has settled a bit.. Is that a fair assumption of how things are for you?

----------


## magie06

Yes. It has settled down.

----------


## Suzi

I'm so glad love. 
How are Ais? G?

----------


## magie06

Ais is finding school tough going. But fair play to her, she gets up every morning without a grumble, and all of her teachers say that she is working hard and all of her marks are very consistent. 
G is tired cause of the overtime. But he's okay and catching up with naps in the afternoon.

----------


## Suzi

Why's she finding school tough? Socially or academically? 
Glad G is able to catch up on a nap!

----------


## magie06

Because of the last 2 years it's been very difficult to settle down. When she turned 13 she started in secondary school and they had 6 months getting used to the routine, etc. Then, bam! everything changed. They worked from home, which meant Aisling did need to be up until around 8. When she goes to school we have to be up much earlier. (6.30 - 6.45). Now Aisling would rather work from home, and meet up with friends at the weekend.

----------


## Suzi

It has been so tough for all our young people. I think they've had it hardest really with all this covid stuff. They've had all the normal secondary stuff, then changing, then uncertainty, then more change - exams/no exams etc with no real understanding of how they are expected to cope.... They are amazing. 

I can understand that she'd rather have more of a lie in!

----------


## magie06

I think they have shown leadership to the so called adults around them. They have had the rug pulled from under them and they can still smile at the little things. Sometimes I'm in awe of what they're achieved through this whole pandemic.

----------


## Suzi

Totally agree.

----------


## Stella180

Welcome to our new normal. 2 years of this is just the start and to be fair the people most able to adapt are our children. Every part of their lives involve change of one kind or another as they grow up cos that’s what childhood is. The uncertainty is caused by adults who don’t know any other way and until the teenagers of today become adults in a position to influence where we go from here we’ll just have to go on improvising.

----------

Suzi (11-01-22)

----------


## magie06

That is a very good way of looking at things. Yes, they're used to change. But I think I forgot to look at it that way around. Thanks Stella.

----------


## Suzi

How are you today lovely? You been doing anything nice?

----------


## magie06

A bit of housework and a bit of knitting. My nextdoor neighbour called in for a coffee in the morning.

----------


## Suzi

Sounds good. Any plans for the rest of the week?

----------


## magie06

I've nothing on this week. I've my postponed appointment with Bridget next Monday.

----------


## Suzi

Why have you changed your appointment?

----------


## Paula

Whens the new appointment?

----------


## magie06

Bridget got covid and only got back to work yesterday. My appointment is bright and early Monday morning at 9.30.

----------


## Suzi

Oh no! Poor Bridget! 
How are you doing love?

----------


## Paula

How did your appointment go?

----------


## Suzi

How are you love? Did you have a good w/e? How was Bridget?

----------


## magie06

I got on fine with Bridget yesterday. I have another appointment in 2 weeks and see the doctor again on 14th Feb. 
We've spent the last few days trying to process what happened to that pretty young girl about 100 km from my front door. I've told my Aisling to be careful and not to go anywhere on her own. I know it was a random act, and I know you have a better chance of winning the lottery, but they have no one arrested for her murder and that makes me very uneasy.

----------


## Paula

Hows your mood atm?

----------


## magie06

It's quite stable for now.

----------


## Suzi

> I got on fine with Bridget yesterday. I have another appointment in 2 weeks and see the doctor again on 14th Feb. 
> We've spent the last few days trying to process what happened to that pretty young girl about 100 km from my front door. I've told my Aisling to be careful and not to go anywhere on her own. I know it was a random act, and I know you have a better chance of winning the lottery, but they have no one arrested for her murder and that makes me very uneasy.


I'm so sorry, what happened?

----------


## magie06

A young teacher went for a run last Wednesday afternoon (around 4pm). She was murdered in broad daylight. They haven't released any details because they only arrested someone yesterday. She had only graduated from teacher training collage in October.

----------


## Suzi

Oh that's so awful. I will never understand how people can do things like that. I can understand you being cautious. Things like that affects the whole community. So horrible....  :(bear):

----------


## magie06

I've been busy this week. I went to school on Monday and took down the door decorations. It took me until today to deconstruct them and put the stuff away. 
I went to physio on Thursday and Aisling and I went to see Belfast in the cinema yesterday. If anyone is wondering, it is a brilliant movie.

----------


## Stella180

Belfast was a brilliant movie, did you know it was based on Kenneth Branagh’s childhood? I really enjoyed the movie. It included emotional moments for my due to the experiences of Ricky’s family and the stories they shared with me. Fab film totally worth watching.

----------


## Suzi

That does sound like a busy week! Did you fit in any self care? How's your pain/mood been this week?

----------


## magie06

Yeah. This week is quieter. I just have a dexa scan on Thursday afternoon. Aisling has quite a few projects due this week, so I'm helping out (with snacks and drinks) while she get them ready.

----------


## Paula

Whats a dexa scan? (Forgive my ignorance)

----------


## Suzi

You're awesome providing drinks and snacks! 

Dexa scan - that's the bone density one isn't it?

----------

Paula (25-01-22)

----------


## magie06

Dexa scan is bone density. In other news, I have shingles.
2020's the decade that just keeps giving and giving!!!

----------


## Jaquaia

Oh bloody hell! Hope you have minimal symptoms and recover quickly  :Panda:

----------


## magie06

Very sore, leaking blisters and of course a bit of a temp and a cough so I had to send a picture to my GP.

----------


## Paula

Oh no! Oh hunni, Im so sorry. Big virtual hugs  :Panda:

----------


## magie06

Thanks. I'm just very tired all the time. I'm sore normally anyway, but this is a different sore.

----------


## Suzi

Oh no! That's miserable! I'm so sorry love. Are you resting at all?

----------


## magie06

I slept through most of yesterday but I found it hard to get comfortable last night. I've stayed home today with my feet up, and I'm heading to bed as soon as casualty is over.

----------


## Suzi

Hope you got some sleep lovely and that you feel better really soon...

----------


## magie06

I've started to feel better at last. 
The results of my dexa scan came through and the bone density is well within normal range. So I don't have to worry about that for a while. 
Aisling started the mock exams on Wednesday and they are going okay so far. She didn't like the science one, but the others have been ok. She even wrote on her English paper that her mom is her best friend. She had to write a report on a poem she has studied. She picked "in memory of my mother" written by Patrick Kavanagh.

----------


## Paula

Aww bless her  :): 

Im so glad youre feeling better, youve been through the mill..

----------


## Suzi

Glad the scan was clear lovely. 
Oh wow, what wonderful things for her to say about you! That would have made me cry loads!

----------


## magie06

I have to admit that my eyes leaked a bit.

----------


## Suzi

That's totally understandable! 

How are you all doing love?

----------


## magie06

I had a meds review today. I asked to be left on what I'm on ATM because they are suiting me. The doctor listened to me and left everything as it is.

----------

Stella180 (14-02-22)

----------


## Paula

Well done, hunni  :):

----------


## Suzi

I'm really proud of you for doing that lovely. Well done.

----------


## OldMike

Very good, if it ain't broke don't fix it I know it's a cliche, you did the right thing Magie  :(nod):

----------


## magie06

She did get a start when I told her that my GP had increased my Lyrica by 50 in the morning for the shingles.

----------


## Paula

Did she make any suggestions?

----------


## Suzi

Why did she have a start about that?

----------


## Suzi

How are you doing love?

----------


## magie06

Hi all. Last week was crazy. Ais and Gerry were both off and I was chasing both of them all week. We had our floors downstairs sanded and varnished on Monday and we had to be gone all day while they were being done. The smell of varnish is still hanging around the house. 
We went to Dublin to do a bit of shopping on Thursday but I wasn't really able for it. At 2 pm I'd had enough and I went to a coffee shop to wait for them before heading back to the train. 
This week has been catching up with sleep and getting used to getting up early each morning again. 
Ais has been getting her results back from her mocks. She has done very, very well and I'm so proud of her. Maybe all the drinks and snacks were worth it!

----------


## Suzi

Well done Ais!! You can tell her how proud of her I/we are!!!

Sounds like you had fun last week - any highlights you'd like to share? 
Bet your floor looks lovely! I'd love real wood flooring! Sounds like you had the right idea to go and get a coffee! Hope you got a slice of cake to go with it!

----------

Flo (06-03-22)

----------


## Paula

Well done Ais!

----------


## Paula

Hi, love, how are you?

----------


## Suzi

I was thinking about you this morning too!

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. Just plodding along. Trying to keep myself distracted and I'm now fighting a head cold.

----------


## Suzi

Oh no, hope the cold leaves you soon. Are you taking more vitamin c?

----------


## magie06

It's gone down into my chest. I'm running a temp on and off all day. My GP reopens tomorrow, so I'll be on the phone bright and early.

----------


## Stella180

Same thing happens to me everytime. It always hits my chest. Thankfully I’ve not been ill in a long while *touches wood*

Hope you feel better soon.

----------


## magie06

Cheers Stella. I was hoping to avoid the antibiotics this time. Not so lucky! :(:

----------


## Paula

:Panda:  rest up hunni

----------


## Suzi

Totally sympathise love. I'm currently on antibiotics too...

----------


## magie06

The first antibiotic was reacting with some of the other meds that I'm on, so I had to stop that one and start a new one on Friday. 
Now, something that has been said to me recently. Are my mental health problems down to actually being ill, or are they learned behaviour? What would happen if I stopped going to Toghermore? What if I stopped taking the meds? What if I became a total gym bunny and started working out every day - to put the same energy into something completely different? What's the worst that can happen? Am I just used to having these crutches in my life, that I really can't imagine being without them? 

I'm now wondering if maybe, I can be discharged from Toghermore. That I can come off the meds (with my GP's help) and that I put the last 12.5 years down to an experience, and say been there, done that, now it's time to move on. 
I'd like your suggestions please.

----------


## Suzi

Please, please, please don't do it! Not yet, you've been so poorly I really think you need to give yourself time to be more stable as you are.... Then start talking to your medical team. I think that the recent crashes you have had prove that, for you, it's not "learned behaviour." I don't know who said that to you but I think it's really dangerous of them to say things like that. When you are slipping it becomes very obvious in your posting style, how often you post etc.... Really, really, please don't do this.... Maybe at some point later, but definitely not right now.

----------


## Stella180

Ok I’ll be honest with you, I mean, you know me. 

I thing the exact same thing on a regular basis. Am I actually mentally ill or just dealing with a lot of heavy shit. If you remove the one major issue of access to my kids, which is enough for anyone to deal with, would I just be a regular person? 

Am I just a lazy fat cow whose lifestyle has created a lot of my physical ailments? I mean let’s list them…
Sleep Apnoea - fat disease 
Diabetes - fat disease 
Asthma - plenty of fat folks with that one too
Hypertension - not helped in any way by being fat.
Various joint problems - made worse by carrying extra weight. 

There is a strong argument for stopping my meds and doing some exercise. BUT…. I have stopped my meds before. I learned that they are the only think keeping me stable. Stable doesn’t mean cured, stable means functioning. When I go off the rails, which I do from time to time I know that it would be unbearable without medication. That’s a fact and if I need medication for me to function mentally, I must have an illness. Also the exercise thing. Oh yeah it really does help but there’s a couple of issues. I’m majorly unfit and need to build it up a lot slower than I’d like. Secondly, my  body breaks down a lot easier because it’s not able to keep up due to being older and having physical problems and these breakdowns take so much longer to get better again due to the very real illnesses. 

Basically, take the meds and attend therapy sessions. You need them. If you want to exercise then go for it, but not if it hurts you. That’s counter productive.

----------

Flo (27-03-22),Suzi (27-03-22)

----------


## Jaquaia

Magie, what would you tell any of us if we'd been told what you have and we're thinking of stopping treatment?

----------

Flo (27-03-22),Suzi (27-03-22)

----------


## OldMike

Don't even think it, it's so easy to think that meds aren't working or I don't need them but they're false thoughts keep on with your current meds regime is my advice.

----------

Suzi (27-03-22)

----------


## Paula

Im with everybody else - this is not learned behaviour, you have a real, serious illness. Your treatment is there to keep you stable enough so you can have a life worth living - with G and with Ais. It is not worth risking everything youve worked so hard to build up over the last 12.5 years just because (I assume) a non medical person comes up with a throwaway comment like that.

Yes, if you do want a healthier lifestyle, then go for it. But its not a replacement for the treatment that has helped you so much for so many years 

Tbh, Im furious with whoever it was that said that to you. They have no idea of the damage they could do

----------

Stella180 (28-03-22),Suzi (28-03-22)

----------


## magie06

After sleeping on it again last night, (or twisting and turning because so much in my head), I rang Bridget this morning and she had a free appointment at 9.30. I explained what had been said, and Bridget said the very same as you've said here. She said that yes, I've come a long way, but she also made me realize that I have a chronic mental health condition, just like I have chronic asthma, and I would never stop taking my inhaler just because I'm not wheezing. I shouldn't stop taking my m/h meds just because I have had a stable spell.

----------


## Jaquaia

I'm glad you've spoken to Bridget  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

I'm so glad that you were able to talk to her and that she helped you see what we see too...

----------


## magie06

I wasn't sure whether to ring her this morning or not. 6 months ago, I wouldn't have picked up the phone.

----------


## Suzi

I'm really, really glad you did.

----------


## Paula

> I wasn't sure whether to ring her this morning or not. 6 months ago, I wouldn't have picked up the phone.


Im so proud of you for calling, Im also extremely proud of you for being able to recognise that positive change in you

----------


## magie06

Last week was a busy one. I had coffee with my sister Mary on Tuesday and with a friend on Thursday. I also had physio on Thursday, but was very sick while I was there and went straight to bed at 4 because I was feeling so bad and I was frozen. I just couldn't warm up. I called my GP on Friday because I was still feeling so bad, and the secretary told me there was a lot of it going around and just stay in bed! 
Thankfully I started to feel better yesterday and Aisling and I went for a spin in the afternoon. I'm so glad that she still wants to do that with me. It was a lovely afternoon. We didn't go far, but I'm trying to teach her our local geography, places where I would have gone when I was younger than she is now. Yesterday I showed her a tree where I had cut my initials on when I was a lot younger. She loved it.

----------


## Paula

Sorry youve been poorly, just glad youre brighter now. That sounds like a lovely time with Ais yesterday  :): 

Hows your mood atm?

----------


## magie06

I forgot my night meds last night. I've spent the day being very nice to me, with the worst hangover without booze ever.

----------


## Paula

Oh hunni, that sucks!  :(:

----------


## Suzi

I'm sorry I missed your post about being poorly and then taking Ais out. I'm glad you're feeling better. 

Ouch for forgetting the meds, I've done that before and I know how you feel... Being kind to you is the best thing you could do.

----------


## Suzi

How are things love?

----------


## magie06

Just checking in. I don't really have a lot to report.

----------


## Suzi

It's good to see you lovely. 
How are you feeling? How are your moods? 
How are Ais? Gerry? 

What are you up to atm?

----------


## Paula

Hey lovely  :):

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. Keeping the good side out. 
When mum passed away, I got the job of ringing her best friend in America that she was gone. They had been friends all of their lives. They were in school together and even when her friend emigrated in the 50's they stayed very close. I got such a shock when the lady in America was taken to the hospital the day mum went, and she passed away on the Thursday. The same week as mum. Her family wanted to bring her ashes home to Galway, to be buried in the family plot. Unfortunately covid put that on hold for over 2 years. We had her funeral on Saturday and while there were tears shed, it was lovely to catch up with friends. We shared a lot of lovely memories and exchanged old photos between us.

----------


## Paula

:Panda:

----------


## Suzi

That is sad, but how lovely you finally got to meet up with people again x

----------


## magie06

Hi all. I have a few minutes to catch up. Aisling is in the middle of her state exams and is finding it very hard going. She's tired and is panicking about each exam before she goes in. We've had English, Irish, geography and this afternoon it's maths. Thank God it's nearly the weekend so she can get some rest. Someone said to me years ago, that the exams are harder on the parents and I can understand that now. 

I had bloods done last time I was at my GP. I knew she had bad news when she rang me with the results. My B12 levels are far too low, so I've had 3 of 4 injections to boost my levels. My inflammation markers were up, but I'm sore so I didn't need to be told that. And my hormone levels have dropped, which means that I am officially in menopause. I'm still processing that, but with the exams, I've kinda parked that until we get over them.

----------


## Paula

Good luck with the rest of the exams Ais!

Im glad your GP is on it and youre getting the treatment you need.  :Panda:  for the soreness and hormones - both are tough to deal with ..

----------


## Suzi

Hope the rest of the exams are kind to Ais! Well done Princess! 

Sorry about the news from the blood tests lovely.

----------


## Stella180

Yay, glad to see you posting. Don’t see you around much anymore and the place ain’t the same without you.

----------


## magie06

Today is Aisling's last day of state exams. And we are both wrecked. Her exam this morning is an hour and a half because they have already done an hour and a half of practical work. So by 11 this morning we will be all done. The papers have been very general in all, but Aisling didn't like the maths or science papers.

----------


## Suzi

Congratulations to you both for getting through them! Special treat tonight then! I vote for ice cream by the bucket!  :):

----------


## Paula

Wow! Well done Ais, and well done you!

----------


## Flo

Well done to you both!

----------


## magie06

It's been a long slog. But we've got through without too many tears. We can sit back and enjoy the summer from now on.

----------


## Suzi

Absolutely! Are you doing anything nice to celebrate?

----------


## magie06

Aisling and a friend went to see the new Buzz light-year movie this afternoon. I was on taxi duty, but I had a lovely walk along the prom in Salthill while I waited. Harry Styles is playing in Dublin next week and we are going to that.

----------


## Suzi

Did she enjoy the movie? 
The walk along the prom sounds lovely. How is walking atm? How's your pain? Thoughts?

----------


## magie06

Walking is crap. I'm walking with a rollator all the time now. Aisling enjoyed the movie. 
We now have no kitchen. Our new one is to be delivered on Monday. We're off to look at paint and flooring.

----------


## Paula

Ooo fun! I love interiors shopping

----------


## magie06

I'll swap with you Paula. I hate shopping. Of any kind. But it's kinda exciting too.

----------


## Suzi

How are you finding the rollator? Are you finding it easier to walk with it? I found it easier when I gave mine a silly name  :O:  

Glad Ais enjoyed the film.. 
How are your thoughts atm love? Are you talking to your care team?

----------


## magie06

Oh yeah. I'm in regular contact with Bridget and all in Toghermore. 
I'm just finding it very difficult to come to terms with the fact that I can't do as much as I used to. That's the worst thing. 
This morning our new kitchen has been delivered, the kitchen fitter has arrived and the sky man is here to fit a new dish and install sky for us. It's good that it's all happening, but I'm very anxious because of all the strangers in my house.

----------


## Paula

I bet, Im going to be having trades in for while starting next week and Im anxious too. Can you get out of the house at all?

----------


## magie06

My car is blocked in by one of the vans ATM. 
The sky man is very easy on the eye and has a sexy Aussie accent.

----------


## Paula

Niiiice  :O:

----------


## Stella180

Good looking strangers who raise the heart rate (not through anxiety) are always welcome lol

----------


## Suzi

Can't wait to see before and after pics of your kitchen!

----------


## magie06

We've been to the tile shop (again!!) And I picked out the dearest tile in the shop. My poor husband needed resus afterwards! I nearly needed it myself because they were 80 Euro a square meter. So we went for a cheaper one.

----------


## Stella180

You really do have expensive tastes. I had to second check to see if this was Paula’s thread lmao.

----------


## Suzi

Wow! That's a big cost! Lol, but hey, you are definitely worth it!  :):

----------


## Paula

> You really do have expensive tastes. I had to second check to see if this was Paulas thread lmao.


Cheek!

----------


## magie06

In my defense they weren't priced. The shop assistant had to ring another store to check the price.

----------


## Stella180

I don’t have excuse your taste for the finer things in life. Stay classy.

----------


## Suzi

> In my defense they weren't priced. The shop assistant had to ring another store to check the price.


ROFL, I remember my Dad once saying to my Mum "If you have to ask the price then you can't afford it... Move on Judy..."

How's it going with people in to do stuff around the house?

----------


## magie06

The fitter thinks he might be finished by this afternoon. The plumber is to come on his way home to plumb in the sink. We are going away for a few days tomorrow, so the electrician is to come at the weekend to fit the oven and hob. DID lost our oven, so we've had to order a different one.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds positive, where are you heading? Somewhere nice?

----------


## magie06

Aisling and Gerry are going to Harry Styles in the Aviva tomorrow night. We are going to stay until Friday. We're going to go by train and my sister is going to drive us to the station.

The fitter finished this afternoon and we just have to wait for the plumber and electrician now.

----------


## Suzi

Are you not going to see Harry Styles?  :):

----------


## Stella180

I saw something on FB saying his level of showmanship is on par with Freddie Mercury. I don’t buy that for a minute but it’s a positive review

----------


## magie06

The two people have gone off to the concert. My daughter in her first of probably many lbd, my hubby in his dad uniform of tee and jeans. 

We had a scare this morning when we got off the train and left a bag behind. Not just any bag, but -THE- bag with concert tickets, reading glasses and my meds. But my meds were way, way, way down the list of reasons to be upset. The tickets took center stage and she wondered if it would be possible to have new tickets sent to someone's, anyone's phone by ticketmaster. 
Thankfully, when they finished cleaning the train the bag showed up, and we were able to continue on our (relieved) way. 
I know teens are prone to tears at the drop of a hat, but to see the tears of my baby, nearly broke me.

----------


## Suzi

Oh no, not THE bag! So glad that the bag was found and all is good! LBD? No way is she old enough! It's so strange when you get so know someone online and you see their babies growing up too! 
Hope she has an amazing time and you all enjoy the break away x

----------


## Paula

Oh wow!  Not the way you all wanted this day to start. Im glad it got sorted - have you been able to relax?

----------


## magie06

Don't worry Suzi, her dad had a zip up under his arm to wrap around her when they went out in public.  :(rofl):  Dad's!!! Who'd want them!

----------

Suzi (23-06-22)

----------


## magie06

I've brought my sewing with me. I've started on my (Christmas) whisper, stockings, so I've lots to keep me busy. I'm going to hit the hay shortly. I won't sleep until they get back, but I have a good book to read.

----------


## Suzi

Did she have a great time? Did she love it? I've heard he puts on a really good show. 

What are your plans for today?

----------


## magie06

She really enjoyed it. Gerry not so much. She (he) spent 105 on merch, and she only got a tee and a hoodie. She had post concert blues this morning, but that was relieved by some retail therapy. I've come back for a rest, and the two of them have gone back to do some more shopping.

----------


## Suzi

I know when Fern went to the Conan Grey and they said that the merch was so expensive, and much more than it was on the website so they both thought it was really rude! 

Retail therapy? Sounds expensive! I'm glad you're pacing and resting - as long as it's what you want to do....

----------


## magie06

I have enjoyed just having the place to myself for a while and reading. I don't do enough of that at home. Each time I sit at home, I see something else that needs to be done. This break has been wonderful. The only drawback is my pain levels are up again. But, I'll be okay.

----------


## Paula

Im so chuffed youre taking time out to just be. You deserve it!

----------


## Suzi

I agree, I think it's perfect and very much needed and deserved..

----------


## magie06

More shopping this morning and we're on our way home now. The train is booked out and very noisy. We have a hen party and a stag party competing to see who can make the most noise.  :X:

----------


## Suzi

Glad you had a good time lovely!

----------


## magie06

No pictures of my new kitchen yet because we are waiting for the floor and wall tiles to be done. I think the painter is due on Thursday, the tiler on Saturday.

----------


## magie06

I forgot to say, on Thursday when I was leaving back the mobility scooter that I had borrowed, while in the shopping center, the lady told me that she loved my hair. I haven't been feeling great about the way I'm looking, but this lady made me feel so much better about it.

----------

Jaquaia (28-06-22),Stella180 (27-06-22)

----------


## Suzi

Looking forward to seeing the pics! 
It's so lovely when someone gives you compliments!

----------


## Paula

I bet you look gorgeous, as ever!

----------


## magie06

Another busy week of trades coming and going all the time. We had the electrician on Saturday and Monday. The painter was due Wednesday but didn't come until Thursday. He was to come back this morning but didn't come until 2.30.

----------


## Paula

How much longer are they going to be around?

----------


## magie06

The painter is finished and paid. The electrician has to hang 2 new pendant lights. The tiler and the lino fitter still have to come.

----------


## Suzi

Wow, it's busy... I always hate that... But is it looking good??

----------


## magie06

I love it. I just wish it was finished now. We are three weeks now since the first press was taken out.

----------


## Suzi

That's not bad going love! Hope it'll all be finished this week!

----------


## magie06

Both myself and Aisling said that today felt like the first day of our summer holidays. So strange that we both felt the same thing on the same day. And we both wondered who will do the eulogy for my dad's funeral when he passes away. That was probably because we went to see him yesterday. He's fine, no danger of him passing any time soon.

----------


## Suzi

Did you do something nice to celebrate the start of your holidays?

----------


## magie06

I had a few jobs to do in town, chemist, school ware centre, and I called to our parish office to enquire about getting a Papal blessing for my sister and her husband who will be 25 years married at the end of the month. They got a blessing when they got married and I thought it would be nice to get another.

----------


## Suzi

I've never heard of a Papal blessing before! That sounds like such a special thing!

----------


## Paula

What a lovely thing to do  :):

----------


## OldMike

That's brilliant  :):

----------


## magie06

We took a trip to see Ashford castle this morning. It is still a beautiful place to see. Aisling was very impressed!

----------


## Strugglingmum

Sounds lovely

----------


## Suzi

I've just googled - WOW! That's a stunning castle!

----------


## magie06

One of my best friends in school, was 22 years passed yesterday. I was a bit down when I got up, but I didn't want to sit mopping around all day, so that's why we went for a spin.
The tiler arrived today so that's another bit of the kitchen finished.

----------


## Jaquaia

:Panda:

----------


## Suzi

Sorry to hear about your friend lovely. 
Glad that the tiler is finished!

----------


## Paula

:Panda:

----------


## magie06

It's weird because she will forever be 31. She has been in my heart at that same age all of these years. And some times, I think I'm still the same age too. I liked being in my early 30's. So if anyone asks any more I'm going to say early 30's.

----------


## Suzi

Do it! Such a young age for her to pass. I hope you have many many happy memories of the time you spent time together...

----------


## magie06

I had an appointment in Toghermore this afternoon. I was to see a doctor, but Bridget told me last week that it might be postponed. I didn't receive a letter or a text to let me know, so I showed up. The receptionist told me when I arrived that it was cancelled. She told me she sent the letter herself. When she checked, she had sent the letter to the wrong address. There was a doctor free, so I saw someone, but it was a new doctor again. But I gave her the benefit of the doubt, and I need to see someone again in 4 months.

----------


## Suzi

Sorry, I hate it when things like that happen. How are feeling about appointments being 4 months apart? How are your moods/thoughts etc?

----------


## magie06

I'm delighted. I'd rather they space the appointments out, rather than just discharge me altogether, itms?

----------


## Paula

Totally makes sense!

----------


## Suzi

Absolutely a healthy way of thinking about it love. Totally get it.

----------


## magie06

The sun came out here today and it is just beautiful. So much so, that we decided to go to the beach. When we got there, it was very windy and cloudy. So we came home again and I sat out the front and finished my book. Then I got too hot and had to come back inside. Seriously, these hot flushes could have waited for a few months to kick in. My poor fan is going full blast to cool me off.

----------


## Suzi

I sympathise re the fan! Mine is on most of the time and it's meant to be between 30 and 40 oC next week  :(:  Definitely not for me!

----------


## magie06

I think I might actually melt!

----------


## Suzi

I have the ceiling fan on, the windows open and my neck fan (which is surprisingly effective) and a hand held electric fan and a traditional one too! I'm trying to get prepared...

----------


## Paula

Whereas Ill just have to cope with the Wimbledon hand fan I bought on Monday. Cant bear the noise of the electric ones!

----------


## Suzi

Lol.. Sometimes the annoying noise is well worth it!

----------


## magie06

Agreed Suzi. The sound is annoying but well worth it.

----------

Suzi (08-07-22)

----------


## magie06

We were in Tayto park on Monday, and today is the first day that I feel normal. I was just very tired after all the driving. I find the day very long, as we leave home around 7, and don't get home until almost 8 in the evening. But the girls love it and I got a good dose of vitamin D. Aisling went to the new Thor movie yesterday and is actually going to her first disco tomorrow night. There is a strict age requirement for these discos and Aisling missed out on going, because of covid, so she's really excited about going.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like fun! 
Sounds like a good day for the girls, were you able to sit and wait while they were on rides etc? Did you manage to just rest for a couple of days? How's the kitchen coming along?

----------


## magie06

Oh better than that Suzi - they rent out electric scooters and we were there early enough for me to get one! So yes, I did rest while the girls queued and went on the rides. 
The kitchen is just waiting on the lino. It's lovely and I have even cooked in it. That is just a minor miracle!

----------


## Suzi

Oh that's awesome! I'm so proud of you for doing that! 
So glad your kitchen is almost finished!

----------


## Paula

Can we see pics when it done?

----------


## magie06

Course you can Paula. 
Today is hot, so I'm sitting beside my fan that going full blast since about 10 this morning. I'm not made for heat like this.

----------


## Suzi

We've had a national emergency put in place for Mon and Tues next week due to the expected 38 -40 degrees! - schools are shutting and it's remote learning only. 
I'm quite looking forward to leaving here and going to Wales on Wednesday for Ben's graduation, I hear the forecast there is 24 - 27 degrees with rain! I've already announced to Ben that I'll be the one in the very soggy dress after standing in the rain for a while!

----------


## magie06

I was silently hoping for rain today considering it's St. Swithins (sp) day. I know I learned a poem about it years and years ago, but I don't remember it. 
St. Swithin's day if thou dost rain,
For forty days it will remain
St. Swithin's day if thou be fair
For forty days 'twill rain nae mair
St. Swithin's day if both rain and shine
Then thoust guess is as good as mine
Maybe bring an umbrella, though that's a fuss
And thou will probably leave it on the bus
Dispense with this areane Elizabethan yapp
Instead consult your preferred weather app.

----------


## Paula

:(rofl):

----------


## Suzi

:(rofl):   :(rofl):   :(rofl):

----------


## magie06

Went to see the railway children this morning. I used to love the tv program back in the day, and I thought the movie was brilliant. I have to admit though, that my eyes must have been affected by hay fever or something, because there was a lot of eye leaking!! Who was crying? Not me! I don't cry at movies!  :(rofl):  :=(:  :(rofl):

----------


## Paula

Honestly, these people who cry at things like that. :(think): . 

Glad you enjoyed yourself : :):

----------


## Suzi

Oh I've heard people cry at things like that..... not sure who, definitely not me or Paula..............................

----------


## magie06

Or me. I don't understand people who have no control over their emotions! :(rofl):

----------


## Jaquaia

:(rofl):  :(rofl):  :(rofl):

----------


## magie06

My brother just showed me a photo of their back yard pool, and if anyone wants me that's where you'll find me.

----------


## Paula

Have fun!  :(giggle):

----------


## Suzi

Sounds perfect!

----------


## magie06

Today was hot, hot, hot. ATM I have my feet in what was cold water 10 minutes ago. I have cooked it to warm now!! 

Aisling asked if we could go to Lahinch this morning so we just took off. We had a lovely day out, and we didn't come home until 6.30. It was a beautiful day and we stopped at the cliffs of Moher on the way back. It was beautiful, and I didn't have to walk up. They have golf buggies to bring people with walking difficulties up to O'Brien's tower. It is so nice up there and the view is outstanding. Aisling was impressed that she didn't have to walk up. She is so funny, because she was doing her best royal wave when we passed people. We had a great day. And it didn't cost much.

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Jaquaia (18-07-22)

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## Paula

That sounds lovely!

----------


## Jaquaia

That sounds brilliant!

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like such an amazingly wonderful day!

----------


## magie06

Aisling told me that she really enjoyed herself and said thank you for bringing her. 
Today is a recharging day for me. I have a few jobs to do in town but I'm making a list and will try to get to them tomorrow.

----------

Paula (19-07-22),Suzi (19-07-22)

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## Suzi

That's awesome! I love hearing about the relationship you two have built together.

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## magie06

I don't know if I was just very tired or if I got too much sun yesterday, but I went to bed and slept for two hours this afternoon.

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## Paula

Probably a bit of both. I glad you listened to your body

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## Suzi

I completely agree with Paula! Glad you listened to what your body needed....

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## magie06

I'm still not feeling great today. I'm supposed to be meeting with a friend tomorrow morning for coffee. I hope I'll be able to go.

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## Paula

:Panda:

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magie06 (20-07-22)

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## Suzi

In what way not feeling well love? Can you have today as a resting/pacing day?

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## magie06

A sick stomach Suzi. 
I met my friend this morning. It was lovely to catch up with her. I had a little gift for her because she's moving to Italy in the next year or so. We've been friends since school, and no matter how long it is between seeing each other, the time just melts away. It was a good catch up.

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## Suzi

Oh love, can you go back to bland "safe" foods for a while? Rice, steamed potatoes, broccoli, etc just to settle it for a while? It's what Fern and I have found to help as we both deal with ibs... 

Are you going to be writing to each other? I love friends like that.

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## magie06

Oh yes. She has two little granddaughters and she moved to the other side of the country to be closer to them before moving to Italy.

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## Suzi

That's lovely. With things like WhatsApp you guys can still videochat etc... It's times like this when technology is wonderful.

----------


## magie06

She is divorcing her first husband, because she has been with her current partner for 6 years. Unfortunately her ex is dragging his heals and is making things very difficult for her. I hope for her sake, that the divorce goes through sooner rather than later.

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## Jaquaia

Are the divorce laws not similar to what the UKs were?

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## Suzi

Hope things all work out for her lovely..

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## magie06

I met my sister for lunch yesterday. She mentioned that we haven't been together as a family unit since mum's funeral. She asked if I could organiser lunch for just the siblings. So I've put the word out, and so far the boys (men) folk are up for it. Now I just have to find a Saturday that suits everyone. Someone is heading to Toronto, someone else is going on a cruise. It's just difficult to get 8 busy people to agree a date.

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## Suzi

It always is! Are you thinking of hosting everyone at your house? Could you make it easier and book a table at a pub/restaurant kind of thing?

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## magie06

It will be in a restaurant. I just have to get the numbers and the date.

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## Suzi

Good plan! You could try giving 3 dates and see how many can come to those?

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## Paula

Are you looking forward to it?

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## magie06

Yes. I'm really looking forward to seeing them all. I think we might go for the 20th August. Most people will be free then.

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Paula (24-07-22)

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## Suzi

Sounds great!  :):  

How are you today?

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## magie06

Not feeling great again. When I got up this morning I had a dreadful headache and I've felt a bit fluey all day. I'm going to have an early night and hope for the best for tomorrow.

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## Jaquaia

Do you need to do a COVID test?

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## Paula

Jess found the headache was the worse..

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## Suzi

Oh I'm sorry lovely..  :Panda:   :Panda:

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## magie06

I've just done an antigen test and it was negative. I just think my body isn't used to all the stuff I'm doing with Aisling.

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## Jaquaia

Then you need to build in time to rest. Do something at home like a movie day. Make an event out of it with popcorn and snacks.

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magie06 (25-07-22),Paula (25-07-22),Suzi (25-07-22)

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## Suzi

Jaq is totally right. Snacks, movie, rest but also spending time together..

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## magie06

I put a movie on this morning and she went to her room. I don't really mind because I know she is busy making arrangements with her friends. She's gone down to our local GAA (Irish sporting association) pitch to welcome home our football team. They played a final yesterday but lost out by a very slim margin. She's gone off for the day and I don't know when I'll see her. 
I'm going to go to bed for a rest this afternoon.

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## Suzi

That sounds very sensible lovely. It's great that she's off out and about with her friends. It means you can rest and pace as much of today as you need to...

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## magie06

The Papal blessing that I ordered for my sister on the 7th July, was delivered on the 15th. My sister is delighted with it. The best present she's ever got. I'm so glad I thought of it. 

I've booked the table for lunch for the 20th Aug. I've sent out the details to everyone and I'm just waiting to hear back from them.

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## Suzi

That's fabulous lovely about the Papal blessing. So glad it's arrived and is truly loved! 
Have you heard back from anyone re the lunch date?

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## magie06

2 of my brothers have said that they are going to go. No word from anyone else.

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## Suzi

Give them time  :O:

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## magie06

I had a call from 2 sisters this morning, to confirm they are coming. So 5 down 3 to go.

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Paula (27-07-22),Suzi (27-07-22)

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## magie06

Oh my, oh my, oh my. This week is called race week in Galway. A special week for longer than I can remember. The only time I missed a meeting in normal times, was when I was very pregnant with Aisling. So, I bought tickets for my sister and I to go ages back. I'm a bit disappointed that I didn't enjoy it as much as I normally did. There was a lot of walking around that I thought would be okay because I had my rollator with me. But now I ache all over, and I won't be able to do anything tomorrow. Good night all.

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## Paula

Night hunni, I hope you plan an easy day tomorrow

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magie06 (28-07-22)

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## Suzi

Sorry it was hard for you love. 
Are you having a recharge day today?

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magie06 (28-07-22)

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## magie06

I need to go up town, but I was waiting for a few deliveries. Now I'm just going to have lunch and do town later.

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## Jaquaia

You know what Magie? I'm loving seeing you post more often!

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## Suzi

Me too!  :):

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## OldMike

And me too.

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## Paula

Did you rest yesterday? How are you feeling?

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## Suzi

How are you today lovely?

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## magie06

I'm not great to be honest, but I wanted to get out of the house. Aisling and I went for a spin in the morning. Unfortunately I lost control of my bladder again. I was hoping to have lunch somewhere along the road so that didn't happen. Is it wrong to want what normal people have? Just to go out, have lunch and come home dry?

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## Suzi

What's up love? I'm so sorry about the bladder. It's not a cure, but could you wear incontinence or period pants? I know lots of people who do...

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## magie06

I'm looking into Tenna for ladies. I have the Always version but they're not that good, plus I get thrush from them.

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## Jaquaia

:Panda:

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magie06 (29-07-22)

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## Paula

:Panda:

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magie06 (29-07-22)

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## Suzi

I have always had the same issue with Always, bodyform are pretty good, although even Primark are selling period pants now... It's not a cure, but it would give you piece of mind and it'd be more subtle too...

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magie06 (30-07-22)

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## magie06

We had our last summer bank holiday yesterday and the rain didn't let up all day. So this morning, Aisling and I went to Limerick for a days shopping. Aisling had a brilliant day and I stocked up on 4 new books. I'm off to bed to jump into a new book.

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## Paula

Typical bank holiday weather then?

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## Suzi

Is the book good? 

Glad that Ais had a good time shopping!

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## magie06

I had to finish up one book first, and that fell out of my hand last night. 
I bought a change of clothes with me yesterday and I wore a pad. I also brought a bed sheet type of pad in case I was still in the car and had another accident. Thankfully I didn't need to change and my car survived too.

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## Paula

Have you talked to anyone about this recently?

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## magie06

Not recently Paula. I haven't seen my own GP and it's difficult to bring up with someone who doesn't know me very well.

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## Suzi

Glad that you didn't have to change yesterday lovely. I agree with Paula - have you spoken to anyone - or are you keeping track of how often/badly it is happening?

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## Paula

Is it worth ringing up your gp surgery and asking to be referred to the incontinence clinic?

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## Suzi

Sweetheart what about calling to see when the next appointment would be to speak to your own GP?

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## magie06

I was thinking of trying to make an appointment with her soon. My B12 is due for the end of the month, so if I have to wait 2 weeks, to see her, it would be nearly due.

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## Suzi

I think that sounds like a really good idea love.

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## magie06

I made my appointment this morning. It's not until August 25th. The receptionist asked me why I was making the appointment, and I just told her that I wanted to see Dr Ann.

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## Suzi

I'm proud of you! Were you able to ask for a cancellation with Dr Ann if one became available?

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## magie06

Yes. I left my number, but I'm not very confident that they will ring.

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## Suzi

It's really positive that you've called for an appointment and that you've left your number. It's not that long ago that you would have struggled with that. I'm so proud of you lovely. I hope they do call, but you do have an appointment booked so each day gets closer to that appointment. 

How are things with organising your family meal?

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## Paula

Well done, love!

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## magie06

The table has been booked for Aug 20th for 1.30. I have booked it for 8 people because no one said that they couldn't come. I sent the message that if they couldn't come to get in contact with me. I didn't get any replies, so I went ahead and booked.

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## Suzi

That sounds perfect!

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## magie06

I'll be sending out reminders nearer the time.

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## Suzi

How are you feeling love?

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## magie06

I'm okay. As the evenings are getting shorter though, my mood is dropping a bit. But I have recognized it happening, and I'm trying to get more vitamin D. I'm also trying to get more sleep and eat better. Last night Aisling and I went to the beach at 8.30 to watch the sunset. It was beautiful! The moon on one side and the sun turning the sky such beautiful shades of pinks, oranges and purples. It was on Aisling's wish list for the summer.

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## Suzi

That sounds lovely! What a special night to remember! I'm really impressed that you've noticed it and are doing what you can... Are you still talking to Bridget?

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## magie06

Yes. She was off for most of July, but is back now. I just called her this morning and told her how I feeling and what I was doing about it.

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## Paula

How magical an evening to share with your baby!

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## Suzi

I'm so proud that you're calling and letting Bridget know what's going on. You really are awesome.

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## Strugglingmum

I love watching a sunset....but watching it with your daughter is even more special. Xx

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## magie06

Paula my baby will be 16 on Wednesday. Not a baby anymore.  :=(:

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## Paula

But always your baby  :):

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## Suzi

Definitely still your baby... My eldest baby will be 22 in Jan, my middle one 19 at Christmas, and my youngest 18 in March. They are all my babies - in fact each night just before I go to bed I call out "Goodnight babies" and they all reply! 

How are you today lovely? Do you have anything lovely planned? 
How's G?

----------


## magie06

We're going birthday party shopping. Plus we're calling on an aunt for coffee. 
G is good. Working away and can't believe that we don't have a mortgage anymore.

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## Suzi

Oh yay to no mortgage! 
Working away? How long's he been gone? When's he due home? 

What's Ais having as her party?

----------


## magie06

Sorry, it's just a turn of phrase. He's still a postman. He still comes home every afternoon. He still gets up at crazy o'clock, but sleeps in the afternoon.

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## Suzi

Ahh, makes sense!  :):  

What've you been up to today?

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## magie06

Went to visit an aunt of mine. Bought some foil balloons for the party, and then bought a great big chocolate cake. 

Then I got a terrible bit of news. My closest sister is to start treatment for lung cancer. She's had a cough on and off for months, and had 2 different scans. They found something sinister and she's having a biopsy next week.

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## Paula

Oh no, Im so sorry love. I hope and pray theyve caught it early and its treatable  :Panda:

----------


## magie06

She is so positive saying it may be scaring from previous chest infections. But she is so scared. I'm trying to process it, so I may be in a bad mood for a day or two.

----------


## Strugglingmum

So sorry to hear about your sister. Sending hugs. X

----------


## Jaquaia

Sorry to hear  :Panda:

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, I'm so sorry to hear that. Will you allow us to help support you and keep us informed?

----------


## magie06

Yes please Suzi. Sarah doesn't want Aisling to know as she hasn't told her boys yet. She wants to tell them together and as we all know getting them together can be difficult. This is where I can vent and talk about everything.

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Suzi (09-08-22)

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## Suzi

Please do love. You know we'll be  here every step of the way x

----------


## Jaquaia

:Panda:

----------


## Suzi

How are you doing love? News like that is so hard... Does she have someone going with her when she has the biopsy taken?

----------


## magie06

I have offered to go with her. My baby is very amusing today. She stayed up until midnight so that we could wish her a happy birthday. She's been getting things ready since she got up. There are enough soft drinks in the fridge to feed an army. The balloons are up, the cake has candles, and we have ice cream in the freezer. 
Otherwise, I think I twisted and turned so much last night that I woke Gerry each time. So much going through my head. Of course because the news is so new, the thoughts are all worse case scenario.

----------


## Suzi

Happy birthday to Ais! Can't believe she's 16! So grown up! 

Do you want to talk through those things in your head? As and when you are ready.

----------


## magie06

I'm not sure of what way these thoughts will come out. I'm trying to challenge the nasty thoughts and put a more positive spin on them itms? I'm going to go out for a walk in a while because that helps to clear my head. I'm not sure how far I'll get because pain levels are high ATM.

----------


## Paula

Happy birthday Ais! 

I always find my pain levels are higher when Im stressed.

----------


## magie06

Me too Paula. 

The sweet 16 party has finished. Everyone went happy and full and we can put the house back to normal.

----------


## Suzi

And me... 

Hunni, get those out of your head in whatever jumble they come in...

----------


## magie06

Just all the why questions at the moment. Why her, why lung, why now?

----------


## Jaquaia

:Panda:

----------


## Suzi

I don't have the answers, but I know that I'm going to be with you as much as I can be love. Lean on us and give us as much of your worry as you can. I mean it... You aren't alone, we may not be there in person, but we're here...

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magie06 (10-08-22)

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## magie06

Night all.

----------


## Paula

Night, lovely

----------


## Suzi

How are you this morning lovely?

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. I slept through the night, so that's a bonus. Today is a day for taking things easy. I have no plans, only out my feet up and drink cold drinks all day.

----------


## Paula

Sounds like a plan  :):

----------


## magie06

Did I say that it's hot. Very hot.

----------


## Strugglingmum

Oh Magie..  we are bot built for his heat in Ireland!!
I took my dog to the beach so we could cool off a bit but I'm home now and putting my feet up for the afternoon with crochet and TV

----------


## Suzi

It's very hot here too! Definite feet up and cold drinks!

----------


## magie06

The basin with cold water is coming out very soon. My feet have swelled up to a nice balloon shape now.

----------


## Suzi

I sympathise! Mine are balloons too!! Hope they've gone down now and you're rested...

----------


## magie06

On our way to Achill. I'll be out of range soon. I'll take lots of photos and talk again tonight. 
We have met with 4 different sets of roadworks already. We've stopped for ice cream because it's so hot. About another hour to go.

----------


## Paula

Have a wonderful time!

----------


## Suzi

Hope you're having the most amazing time!

----------


## magie06

We've had a lovely day out. We've stopped for food on our way home. I needed help to get back to the car, and I almost blacked out when I got there. Then when we were leaving the beach I had to reverse down a very narrow road and I got stuck in the ditch. 5 people had to get me out. But, I DIDN'T panic and we're now on the "right side" of the crappy roads. (i.e. they are behind me.) We should be home around 7.30.

----------


## Suzi

Oh no! Was it pain that caused you to need help and to feel that you were going to blackout? That's horrible. So glad you had people around you to help. I'm so proud of you that you didn't panic and you haven't allowed those small incidences to ruin your day!

----------


## magie06

Yes Suzi. My back was in spasm. I could hardly move.

----------


## Suzi

Oh love, that's so horrible. I really feel for you. It seems to be a steep decline in your mobility... I totally empathise with that... So glad you managed to have a good day - I assume tomorrow is a recharge day?

----------


## magie06

Oh yes. I'm not going further than my sitting room, beside my fan.

----------


## Paula

:Panda:

----------


## Jaquaia

Here you go Magie! Stunning photos!

----------


## Paula

Wow! Gorgeous

----------


## magie06

We really had a great day. Aisling was worried about me though. She was going to ask the lifeguard for help. All I needed was a bit of a breather and some water.

----------


## Suzi

Stunning!! 

I know it's scary for kids, but actually telling them what you need at that moment to get through can be really good for them. I've found it really helpful for mine to understand and so they don't panic. It's made it easier for me to go out and about with them. 
For example, if I'm struggling with stairs - Fern wanted to follow me up them, Marc said no. He said "what would  you do if she fell?" Fern answered "catch her" Marc said "Nope, if you did then you'd end up both of you hurt, I'd push her forwards..." Also just knowing that sometimes just stopping for a moment or sitting with a drink actually makes it so much easier than saying "I need help" or "I need to stop." 
Might be worth talking around some coping strategies with her? We've always tried to make it a bit of a joke and taking the p*ss out of the situation - the same as we did when Marc was having panic attacks. Them having some strategies helped keep them calm and made it not so panicky for them itms? It's also really helped when they've had friends who are struggling or when they are... Knowledge is power and all that... 
The other thing I've done is I've bought some cards from a friend who owns and runs https://stickmancommunications.co.uk/  which say what issues I may have such as fibro, issues with temperature regulation, need to not stand still etc which I have clipped to my sunflower lanyard so I can a) just push them at someone if I've "lost my words" b) they allow time and understanding... Might be another thing to help. Hannah makes them for physical and mental health issues. She has EDS herself, so really understands so much!

----------


## magie06

Those are great ideas and I will certainly look into them. Thank you. 
G and Aisling have gone to Galway but I stayed home. I'm still not 100% so I thought it was better to stay put. I have cold drinks to hand and my fan going fully. 
One thing that came out of yesterday was that Aisling emailed the transition year head, and asked if they could learn sign language, because one of our helpers yesterday was deaf and while we were being helped, Aisling looked up how to say thank you on Google. She thinks it will help more than learning Chinese.

----------


## Paula

What a wonderful idea - and what an amazing young woman you have raised  :):

----------


## Suzi

That's fab! There are loads of really good videos on youtube if it helps. I used to know a lot of British Sign, but I'm more fluent in Makaton now  :O:

----------


## magie06

Aisling and her ex-boyfriend have arranged a visit to Dublin next Wednesday. I don't mind her going, but I'm nervous at the same time. G wants me to go with them, so it looks like I'm off to Dublin next Wednesday. 
In other news I've changed the position of my fan, and it's now right in front of my face. 
My nextdoor neighbours had their family around yesterday. Our bedroom windows were wide open. It was lovely to hear the laughing and talking that was going on.

----------


## Suzi

Do you want to go with them? Are you planning on going around with them or staying cool in a coffee shop?

----------


## magie06

I'll find the nicest coffee shop with the best a/c and plonk down for the day.

----------

Stella180 (14-08-22)

----------


## Suzi

Take a book and some knitting!  :):

----------


## magie06

We have rain!!

----------


## Suzi

Send it over to me!

----------


## Paula

So jealous.

----------


## Suzi

Morning love, how are you doing?

----------


## magie06

I'm okay. I collected Aisling around 10.30 last night. She was supposed to be on a sleepover. Aisling doesn't like sleepovers. I dropped her back out this morning and have just picked her up again.

----------


## Paula

Jess never liked sleepovers either

----------


## magie06

I'm just home again. My sister had the biopsy today, and another scan, and now they think that it's a benign tumor. We are both relieved.

----------


## Suzi

Mine have always preferred to have people here to sleep over too.. 

Such a relief about the biopsy!

----------


## Paula

Thats wonderful news!

----------


## magie06

I'm so relieved.

----------


## Suzi

I'm not surprised... 

What's on tomorrows agenda?

----------


## magie06

Hopefully we can have a quiet day. I must have been holding my breath since last week and didn't realize it.

----------


## Paula

Whats on the agenda today?

----------


## Suzi

That makes sense lovely... I hope you get to have a restful, but fun day today!

----------


## magie06

We've had a very lazy day. The plumber came back to fit my safety rail and hang the mirror. Otherwise I've been watching movies because the thunder has knocked out our sky dish.

----------


## Suzi

Did you see anything good? 
Glad you've had a recharging day lovely, sounds like you need it.

----------


## magie06

Today, when we got into Dublin, the 2 said goodbye to me, and went on their way. I got onto a tour bus and sat back to enjoy the ride. It was lovely to see things like a tourist, but I didn't go into any of the attractions. I stayed on the tour the whole way around and when I got back I got something to eat. I had a bit of an anxious wait for them to get back to the station but they made it, and I didn't let them know how anxious I was. We're on our way home again and I'm really sore and really tired.

----------


## Suzi

That sounds like a lovely day. Can I ask why you didn't tell them about the anxiety? Are you going to be able to rest tomorrow?

----------


## magie06

I have nothing to do today. G and Aisling have gone supermarket shopping. I'm thinking of going to go upstairs to rest.

----------


## Paula

Sounds like a plan

----------


## Suzi

How has the resting gone?

----------


## magie06

I slept for 2 hours.

----------


## Suzi

You obviously needed it!

----------


## magie06

Going to close this because it's rather long.

----------

Suzi (19-08-22)

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